Dating someone you like when you're in love with someone you can't have. Is it a bad idea? How do you handle it?

I'm in love with my best friend but we can't be together. I cut him off 5 - 6 months ago because I think he's in love with me too and it keeps me from dating other people and he won't allow me to move on. Whenever I go on a date he text bombs me, gets too clingy and annoying. And because I love him and want to be with him, I let him interfere with my relationships. I couldn't move on either. When he noticed me distancing myself from him it would drive him crazy and he would call me and text me 24/7. We can't be together because he is in a relationship with another girl and they've been together for 8 years. Him and I were friends for 3 years. I spoke to him about it so many times but he refuses to tell me how he feels and just pretends that he sees me as a friend, but I know he doesn't because of his behavior. He even said he's really really attracted to me and that we'd be together if he were single.

Anyway I cut him off. It wasn't fair to me and I couldn't handle it anymore. It's been 5 months since we've spoken. He has contacted me 3 times since I cut him off, and the last time I spoke to him I told him I didn't want to hear from him anymore and that I moved on (that was a lie, but I had to do it). It's now been 2 months since I've heard from him.

I met a great guy a month ago. Funny, sweet, cute. I really like him. We have so much chemistry and get along and we've already had sex. But I can't but cry sometimes because I miss my bestfriend so much and I'm still in love with him. I don't know what to do because I do like this new guy, but I'm so confused. I know my bestfriend and I will never be together so I'm trying really hard to move on but sometimes it's difficult.

Has anyone been in a similar situation. How do you deal with it? What should I do?



Most Helpful Girl

  • Your over thinking it. Just let things play out if he makes you laugh and you have fun then keep at it and let your feeling develop if its meant to be... I was with my husband 6 years and he left me I met a new guy and it was weird at first being with someone that wasn't my husband we dated for a few months and I got comfortable with it I fell for him and then my husband wanted to work things out and I lost all the feelings I had for him and it took time for me to get over the ex and fall back in love with my husband but it was the right thing. So ya just saying sometimes you just need to wait for your heart to catch up


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What Guys Said 1

  • Hey if there's no ring. Its fair game. Everyone is just settling until something else better comes along


What Girls Said 1

  • Just continue dating the guy. With your best friend out of your life, hopefully time will help heal and help you move on.