Girls; Your View On These Kinda Guys

Ok say you're dating this guy... he has a lot of qualities that others might assume he's gay. Like having a good fashion sense. I have a good fashion sense,I got complemented almost everyday on what I wore but I also had a lot (A LOT) of people ask or ask around if I was gay. I like to fix my hair and stuff, I play tennis, and I'm emotional. I like Coldplay too (lol) but only a few songs and pl assume I'm gay. I have a girlfriend and they STILL think I'm gay! What would you think of him? And if you weren't dating him what would you think?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think you sound like a great, sensitive, modern guy surrounded by immature people who stereotype others in the most crass ways possible!

    People should realize that there is no correlation between behaviours like dress sense and emotional sensitivity and sexuality. One of the glorious things about human beings is that we come in many varieties, and we should celebrate the fact that there isn't one kind of gay person and one kind of straight person. There are many guys who have far more 'camp' behaviour than you, who are actually straight. Equally, one of the most 'manly' guys I know is gay.

    Just get on with being yourself. I suspect that as you get older, the problem will fade away as people get more experience and become more mature. Good luck!

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    • I like your answer :) now I have another question. You're an older more mature woman. If you go to my profile and find a question "Sex; My First Time" and answer that I would be happy :)

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    • Let's deal with the 'experience' thing first. I wouldn't worry about this. She's got a tiny bit more sexual experience than you, but it's not like she has years of mad, passionate sexpertise over you. I'd say the pair of you are still pretty much on a par. So it's not all that surprising that she's still a bit nervous about sex, and feels a bit awkward about asking you to do things. This doesn't mean that she's not 'ready' - the only way you can ascertain that is to talk and listen.

    • Hmm yeah I see your point... well we can talk about it well and tell each other what we'd like and wouldnt

What Girls Said 10

  • i know a lot of great dressing guys who fix their hair - I don't think they are gay. and what the heck is gay about Coldplay? they are one of the most awesome bands EVER. wouldn't you be blasting Madonna if you're gay? that's what my friend Shawn plays anyway, haha

    but yeah, are you sure there isn't anything else? I don't think people would assume you're gay just because of things like that. if they do, they're lame. you know that you're straight, so don't worry about it.

    i've been asked if I was gay once because I was focusing on my studies and not interested in dating for a while... if that makes me a lesbian, than I guess I am - forget the fact that I LOVE men lol. people are people and will always talk. just be comfortable within yourself and not worry about them.

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    • Well I live in a small town. A lot of the people here are way immature : / plus the fact I went a year without a gf

  • well I have gay friends. I think those people just assume things way too fast. I wouldn't assume a guy who likes coldplay to be gay. I think the people think you're gay are absurd

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  • Nowadays people get called 'Gay' for silly things they do.

    I wouldn't think you are, it's so normal to be into fashion and looking good, and liking Coldplay

    just gives us an idea on what kind of music you could like.

    Being real gay is just life, it's not a style and it doesn't focus on certain music genres. But

    there are too many immature people, usually driven by jealousy, who stereotype.

    Between I have a friend who is like you, into fashion, all looking good and called gay.

    He is not gay but a normal guy, fun and sensitive and I would never think of him

    being into guys, no no. =D

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  • I would think he was just metrosexual. Hell, I am practically in love with a guy who is quite feminine with lots of female friends outnumbering his guy friends and he is obsessed with cats like some kind of giggly girl. But he's straight. I wouldn't think anything because I have met people who dress nice and aren't gay, I've met guys who didn't appear "pretty" in the least bit but are gay. It is all stereotypes and sadly, you'll encounter this kind of treatment in a lot of places you'll go within your lifetime. But just forget them because your true friends will stick by your side, and so should your girlfriend; I mean she kisses and is sexually involved with you, why should she doubt who you are sexually? You just have to hold your head up high and forget what they say; people who are fashion-challenged don't understand people who are stylish, just call it envy. People are dumb, though, and say hurtful things. I've been there. You know you aren't gay, so flaunt that. You are you and straight or gay nobody can tell you who you are.

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  • lol You sound like on of my friends... He has a similar problem and his was kinda worse because the first friend he made at our school was this gay guy. He's cool and everyone loves him, but it didn't help his case.

    Your ANSWER:

    It depends on the girl. I know some girls that would immediately assume he's gay and I know others like me that would say "He has a girlfriend so uh... possibly but doesn't look like it for the moment at least." I would probably just think you were alittle feminine... (as with the case of my friend)

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  • I wouldn't think he was gay. Honestly I like guys who dress nice & put a little effort into their appearence. So if people think your gay don't worry about it unless you think you might be but their oppinions shouldn't matter or mean anything if you know your not.

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  • I woulden't assume anything, if I didn't know they guy.

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  • he is truly awesome(: and rare!

    and maybe needs to explore alittle ;)

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  • I dated a guy like this once... He had a roommate who was gay, his roommate questioned on his sexuality.. My boyfriend began to wonder if he was gay? Just because he like to dress nice, very fashioned, even made sure his hair was perfect when we went to the market.. I assured him he wasn't but it wasn't enough.. SO I took him to a gay club, gave him an idea of the feeling of gay is... Turns out it wasn't for him... There are allot of guys who have a softer side, it doesn't mean he is gay... It means he has what I call a "MAN GINA" ... I have nothing against gays at all, my best friend is gay! NOT my bf!

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  • You sound like the perfect boyfriend! I wouldn't think you are gay. You just like to take care of yourself, look good and are in touch with your feelings. You may be ahead of most guys. I had a similar situation where people wonder if the guy I was with was gay. We have broken up but I still have my doubts. For example: He wasn't excited about sex, often referred to his buddy as the other girlfriend (I never met his friend), he would spend more time with him, rumors started after we broke up that he was fooling around with a guy from the neighborhood and other questionable things. Still wondering? But you are fine, so don't worry about what other's say.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Dude, I like coldplay, take care of my hair, choose my clothes carefully, etc. etc.

    That's not being gay ! That's being from the 21st century !

    On that note, I'd start by avoiding pictures like the one you have now on your facebook and stuff, the shiny clothes to suggest a slight crookedness.

    Think of it this way: If you're not sexually attracted to men, you're NOT gay.

    You must live in a fairly conservative society for people to think you've crossed the line, come to Geneva and look at a couple guys here. They wear skin tight jeans, poofy shiny jackets (Mont Clair), shiny shoes and v-necks that stretch down to their toes.

    Show your friends a picture of that and ask what they think of you.

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  • If your gay your gay. If your not your not. Who cares but you... I have both straight and gay friends. Does it matter no ! The only problem I have ever found is when (gays) try to justify or push there thoughts on others. Dude don't worry about what anyone else thinks male or female - EVER! Just go be your self and enjoy life.

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