Do guys still ask girls out on dates?

I'm an 18 year old girl. I put myself in plenty of situations where I'm able to meet guys, both by myself and with my girlfriends. None of us have ever been approached, asked for a number, had a drink bought for us... nothing like that. The only move guys seem to make on me or my girlfriends come of a quite sexual, like trying to touch inappropriately while we're dancing or something. I'm just curious as to whether guys my age, or in their early 20's are interested in relationships and whether they ask girls out on dates anymore. Does chivalry exist anymore? Maybe I'm living in the wrong time. Thanks for any answers :)


0|1
0|14

Most Helpful Guy

  • Heh, maybe you need to look outside your age range :)

    1|0
    0|0
    • Yeah, that would probably help, expand my range a little. How old is too old do you think?

    • That's a personal comfort zone you need to determine. In actuality, it's people that matter, not their ages. But, that doesn't mean you can throw off the shackles of societal conditioning, just because I tell you to. You have to decide what you're willing to try. My range (when I was your age) is not going to be your range.

    • Also: re: going in a hens group. You can take all your female friends with you... as long as you leave them; like to go order drinks, or to go do something - all by yourself - some of the time. That means you can have them to have fun with, and to walk you out the door/to your car, to run interference with creeps, etc. But, if you want a guy to approach you, make sure he's got an opportunity to do so when he's not running a gauntlet - that's on you to provide him that opportunity to do a little one-on-one.

What Guys Said 13

  • Depends on where you're at. Most people see a "relationship" type of date when two people bump into each other at the grocery store or book store and start talking. But if you're going to bars and stuff you're gonna get hit up for sex basically. Your age range is notorious for being the "party phase" of people's lives where people randomly sleep around and stuff. There's really nothing wrong with it if you're safe about that stuff. Many people get all the hooking up outta their system then around 25-30's look for settling down when they have jobs and a place to live and so on.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Probably because when a guy says "hello how are you doing" and it's deemed harassment these days. See "Woman Secretly Records 10 Hours of Harassment" video.

    2|2
    0|0
    • Ah yeah, that is a problem. But not all girls are like that. As long as it doesn't seem really sexual, and it's a genuine "Hey, how are you?", then I'd stop and chat for a while.

  • Depends on where you are. You definitely won't get guys asking you out on a date at bars or something. But I approach girls when I go out to get eat or something, I'll usually ask for a number to potentially set up a date.

    2|0
    0|0
    • Yeah, that is what I wish would happen to me! What compels you to approach a girl?

    • Some guys only do it in a social setting in which they feel comfortable, but plenty of guys do it the way I do it as well. I'll approach any girl that I think I find attractive, or if she looks like she's in a good mood and just has that positive give going. Good looks alone won't get guys to approach you, it helps, but its important to have that inviting personality. I approach girls even if they're in a bad mood, or at least appear to be lol. But that's just because I kinda don't give a fuck. I just enjoy general social interactions, its fun to me.

    • "... positive give going"
      Excuse the auto correct, I meant vibe* not give.

  • I still do, but I dont ask girls who I know won't say yes. Im not one to put myself in a situation where I get turned down and make some women feel better about herself. Im a realist not a dreamer when it comes to women.

    1|0
    0|0
    • Does a lot of your decision about whether or not to ask a girl out have to do with appearance? I think for some girls appearance is obviously considered, but often girls are way more interested in personality. And sometimes the most gorgeous women are the most lonely because no one will ask them out because they are intimidated, or they keep getting asked out by losers with no personalty.

    • im all personality, being an absolute piece of gold heaven is a plus. But I dont really care about looks or weight. I want a women that gets my weirdness and my jokes. Especially one that smiles all the time.
      I wouldn't mind asking the lonely gorgeous women... if most of them weren't horrid creatures with an ego that makes me sick. But I have met gorgeous women who where absolute angels on the inside. They will always be the little piece of heaven I had the enjoyment to be around them and hear their life story.

  • Yeah I do and I get rejected all the time, I don't blame anyone I just need to work on my game. Cut some guys slack it's hard because it feels like your going to get thrown out of an airplane each time you do it with the way my heart rate increases. So how about you either start it yourself or have eye contact, smile and say hello.

    1|0
    0|0
    • Yeah, I thought maybe it was a rejection thing. Some girls are so harsh! And I've seen some girls lead guys on for validation which is just wrong. So I totally understand the way you feel. I could definitely make more of an effort myself to initiate a conversation at least.

  • Guys still do but it depends the scene I guess, im sure in bars and clubs guys aren't looking for a girlfriend, they're looking for a good time. It really depends where you meet the guy, you can also ask a guy out as well, equality is cool too :).

    1|0
    0|0
    • Maybe that's our problem, we mostly only go to bars and stuff. Do you know where girls are most likely to meet guys seeking relationships? I'm not sure about my friends but I've asked guys out before, mostly after I've known them for a bit and I am always rejected. So I guess I've kinda given up on asking guys out... at least for now.

    • Show All
    • @Nomad93 Yeah it sucks :( The thing I've learned from rejection though is that it's all got to do with them. It's not a reflection of yourself. It's not really personal. You're not unattractive or boring or awkward or anything just because they weren't interested. Sounds cheesy but someone will like everything about you, finding that person can be a little tricky though.
      @Tunakid Okay, so I'll definitely stop looking at bars and clubs. And once I've found some new places to hang out do you think it'd be better to go alone or with friends? I've heard that guys are sometimes much more intimidated by girls in groups, but are more likely to approach a girl if she is alone.

    • I think i'd go alone or maybe bring another friend if she's interested. One or two is fine but anything more than that may be a bit intimating for another guy to go up to you and flirt.

  • Yes, but I don't recommend it to guys anymore unless he's already in a relationship because that tends to lead to an expectation for the guy to pay for most if not all of it. And if you're just dating around to get to know people, that is a lot of money

    0|1
    0|0
    • Anyways, yes there are guys looking for relationships and that ask girls out. But i was never one of them. I would ask girl out on dates, not with the purposes of getting into a relationship but to get to know them. Because if we like eachother and it goes well, then we'll go further. It's a trial and error thing. But if you go in looking for each person to be your partner, there's a neediness that you give off. So it's better to not date hoping for a boyfriend or girlfriend and instead just do it because you like them and they seem cool.

  • We do, sometimes they don't realize we're asking them on a "date" if we don't say the word "date". That, in my mind, is stupid.

    Two people + One asks other to something at specific time + askee says "Yes" + asker pays = date.

    1|0
    0|0
    • I have never used the word "date", maybe that's my problem (not trying to be sarcastic)?

    • Yeah, I must admit, I've been really confused about this before. I guess it gets a little complicated depending on the person who asked you. If it's at a venue where I've just met a guy, he gives me his number and says let's catch up at wherever at this time, then I would assume its a date. My close guy friend started flirting with me, then suggested we go on a picnic together by ourselves. I assumed it was a date, I was wrong. Apparently it was just a friend thing, but it was obviously a very awkward situation. So I know that next time, unless the word date is used, understandably, I'll be a little weary.

    • @AlwaysBelieving, I don't think that's sarcastic, I think some people truly don't realize they're being asked on a date if the word "date" isn't used.

  • I do it all the time it doesn't seem to work 70% of the time but damn its worth a try and its a hard thing to do face to face. Haha i feel like girls are so stunned that they tell me no!
    Also the girls i ask sometimes i know them, sometimes i don't.
    Chivalry is not dead a carry the torch lol.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Not me.. Id never put myself through that humiliation

    1|1
    0|0
  • I'd say that those guys are missing out on a lot. But in general, I think guys are idiots for a much longer time period than they were previously...

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes, I think so.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes, but they're usually ugly

    0|1
    0|0

What Girls Said 0

No girls shared opinions.

Loading...