Has the term "friendzone" lost all meaning?

My friends used to tell me they'd been friendzoned when we were all in our early to mid twenties. Their stories always involved months of dating a woman, spending thousands of dollars on presents and dates, and then being rejected the first time they unambiguously sought physical affection from her. This is a rare thing because most women aren't cynical enough to rob a man blind with the false promise of eventual sex nor are they up their own asses enough to think their "friends" are supposed to take them out all the time and spend money on them. Meanwhile, most guys are capable of setting some kind of boundaries.

I can remember seeing women complain about the use of the term as representing "feelings of entitlement to sex" which is bogus if friendzone means what I thought it meant. Guys need to set those boundaries I was talking about and guys who know need language to explain this to guys who don't.

But in this site, people (especially young people) use the term friendzone to refer to situations where they are actually friends. If that was all the friendzone was, then nobody in it deserves much sympathy or needs any advice other than "get over it".

But then how do we describe the scenario of the gold-digging partner who won't put out and pretends there was never a relationship?


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What Girls Said 1

  • Well if a girl makes it clear from the beginning that she doesn't want a relationship, then there is no friendzone. Actually there's no friendzone at all. It's not like the girl owes a relationship to the guy cause he was nice. But yeah, these days people use the term a little loosely, they need to man up.

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    • I'd go even further than simply when she makes it clear. I say if she isn't deliberately ambiguous just to exploit his inability to set boundaries, there is no friendzone.

      Expanding the definition beyond that is the entitlement women were bitching about, and yet I see more women use the term that way. (on this site, that is; and it obviously shows me more female posts since I'm male)

      And yes, it isn't a zone, and they aren't friends, and she doesn't put him there. But it is a real phenomenon, and guys need a way to talk about it. I'm glad I'm not the only one who sees this.

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    • Not women's entitlement. Women have, in the past claimed that use of the term "friendzone" represented entitlement.

      This was utter bullshit before, as we were using this term to discuss the problems of guys who, far from feeling entitled, were the biggest pussy-worshiping, self-hating males in the world.

      The way the term is used now, though, it gives validity to the ide that guys feel entitled to quid pro quo in dating, and at the same time fails to help some sap who hates his own balls and thinks he has to buy pussy with a combination of money and self-hate.

    • Ooooh lol I get it now, that's true

What Guys Said 0

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