I always seem to suspect that when a guy asks me out... that he really just wants sex (or something else). I guess I don't see guys liking me for me that often. They're always just so into my body and my looks... when will they like me for my personality and who I actually am?
Why do I always suspect guys have an ulterior motive when they like me?
What Guys Said 11
Just going to throw this out there: if we don't go out on dates (which I'll ask you on because I probably thought you were pretty), how am I ever going to learn anything about your personality? I can know if you're pretty in an instant--determining if you have a good personality takes time.
In other words, if we've just met, it's impossible for me to know anything about your personality, your looks are all I have to go on. And that's why I ask you out--to learn about you.
Perhaps you are dismissing people too quickly because of personal insecurities, rather than anything about them?0
Guys like sex, and want sex, period. Deal with it, if you don't like it, then date women. Guys hit on you because they find you sexually attractive primarily, now all they have to do now is decide if your likable or not. So sexual attraction first, then they see if your cool or not. There is nothing wrong with a guy wanting sex. Sex isn't a taboo.0
- Show AllShow Less
Are you asking when they will like your personality as well as your looks or instead of your looks?0
Lack of confidence.0
Its pretty likely that they do, better play it safe.0
Just trying to get lvl 2 since this bitch site won't let you post links at lvl 1 sorry0
I feel like when girls show interest, they either are trying to get to know me just so they can make another guy jealous or are just trying to be friendly. Also, I sometimes feel like they only want to get to know me so that they can use me to get to know some of my friends.0
It's not an ulterior motive. It's the primary motive because every guy, unless he was gay, probably would have desire sex with you if you showed interest in him. (Preferably naked and holding a bottle of whipped cream)1
Well I won't ever have sex with a girl without getting to know her first and also have an std test done on her and me also for her sake. Honestly it's not all about looks. I've talked a lot of attractive girls who I could tell right off the bat that they were bat shit crazy or they were the wild party type. Or they were ghetto. The list goes on. Most times I can tell all of this just by observing how she acts around others. Now if she doesn't throw any of those red flags i'll try to get her out on a date and just get to know her and take things from their. This is the whole purpose of a date. Now remember if you feel a guy just wants to use you don't forget that you hold the cards. Don't give it up to him if you feel that way. After 6 or 7 dates he's still with you then he probably likes you for your personality! :) He would have moved on to another girl by then if he just wanted to bang you.1
- Show AllShow Less
What Girls Said 4
Guys tend to be more visual creatures and are usually initially attracted towards a girl for her looks. However, if she doesn't have the personality to back it up, they will not stick around for the most part. I'm sure I'm stepping on some toes here, but that's generally how it is. A guy will not pursue a girl he personally deems unattractive, nor will he continue to hang out with a girl if her personality rubs him the wrong way even if she is slamming hot.
It's possible you feel this way because guys are constantly complimenting you, thinking that they are making you feel good when instead they are making you wonder if that's all that matters to them. Try not to see it that way. Take it for what it is, which is an indicator that the guy is into you and wants you to know it.
While it might have been your looks that reeled him in closer, the guy did like your personality and liked you for you if he stuck around for any length of time. Feel good, you apparently have a lot going for you and have the best of both worlds! Life is too short to waste being insecure with yourself on any level.0
I wish I knew girl. For now I'll just look at the responses for what others say.
For me, I feel like the guy never sees me for me. Like they really don't understand me, but like the idea of me. If you get that. >.<0
Omg I always think the same thing.
I'm just like... oh he just wants sex. Oh he's just doing a bet. Oh he doesn't drive and needs rides somewhere. Oh he's just dumb and needs help with homework. Oh he's just using me to get back at some girl.
Like I feel like the intentions are never pure.0
- Show AllShow Less
Select as Most Helpful Opinion?
You cannot undo this action. The opinion owner is going to be notified and earn 7 XPER points.