What is wrong with me? Lol?

I am currently a student and also a full time employee, so I try to get as much social life as much as possible. But recently I have been thinking when am I ever going to have a committed relationship?

Haha I know it's a question that we most single people ask but to be honest I think I have tried everything in the book! Online dating, random outgoings, friends of a friends, blind dates, U name it! And not one result has pulled through any serious stages :( lol

I'm not desparate it's just it has been almost 4yrs+ without a committed relationship and life feels as if I'm missing a companion lol!

I know also patience is a virtue and trust! I have been patient and I have been enjoying my single life BUT when? Where is he? Lol

I guess I'm trying to find a conclsusion or a sign lol just help a girl out! Lol


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Most Helpful Guy

  • There's nothing wrong with u.

    Just keep swimming just keep swimming

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    • Lol! Nice I'll keep that in mind but I feel that i have been swimming for too long hahahaha

    • Hey, don't sweat it. I'm 22 and never dated. So keep ur chin up

    • Will do and same to you (: I hoe u find her as well!

What Guys Said 26

  • There is nothing wrong with you on the surface, however it is easy to see why you're not in a committed relationship. Working full-time and schooling consumes your entire week when you include studying (lower-division courses maybe less so, upper division absolutely). You may not believe this and think it's possible to have it all, but the truth is you can't. Why? Because as human beings, we need to sleep. There aren't enough hours in a day to compensate for it.

    Committed relationships aren't formed during this period in our lives. They are formed either before or after. What you're asking for at this juncture is a complete product that requires assembly, yet you have no capacity to actually assemble it without sacrificing your duties at work and your studies at school. Get rid of this notion that a committed relationship is waiting amongst the roses, fully blossomed and ready for picking. It takes work, it takes COMMITMENT. You have to sow the seeds and nurture the relationship in order to have the product you desire.

    Once you're willing to be honest with yourself and see that at this particular time it's not reasonable, then you will understand that being single isn't a problem and nothing is wrong with you. You're just busy and that's that. Yes, we all want companions at some point. That's part of our biology and why babies are born.

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    • Thanks I appreciate ur words it really had me thinking but again I enjoy being single it just that it has been too long and I have seen others that I have the same amount of time and have companions why not me?

    • Confirmation bias, perhaps?

      The biggest reason why people seem to get together in spite of all factors pointing to impracticality is institutional favor (its my theory, maybe I'll write a book). On the same token, people who can't seem to find relationships under the same impractical terms are institutionally unfavored.

      Someone who is institutionally favored belongs to a large, well-subscribed social group that coincides reasonably to their current obligations. For example, a Christian who goes to Church every Sunday joins a network of like-minded Christians, and interacts with these like-minded Christians on a regular basis. Going to church is an obligation, and the people at church or in the network as a whole coincide with that obligation.

      An institutionally unfavored individual is the one who works in an office with unsuitable partners, say. At school the guys are too busy in class or already taken.

      We don't have much control over institutional influences in real time.

    • Yes I believe u should write a book. Very intellectual and u got me thinking (:

  • In other words you are looking for a partner to get in a exclusive relationship with and all the others didn't want that?

    That's odd. I figured most people like those type of relationships. Or is it that you are very picky and weren't totally interested in those people?

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    • I'm actually not picky at all. I always go with the flow and find out if we have a connection of some sort. Lol so idk.

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    • B and C are the same aren't they? O. o

      All I can say is keep trying LOL.

    • XD yes! I agree man I am trying to hard though! And there are times where I just 🎶 let it flow let it flow!!! Lmao

  • I would tell you not to worry about it. If you seem desperate it makes you less attractive just like when you see a man who is desperately trying to get your panties off it turns you off a bit doesn't it. Just think about what you like in men personality wise and be more like that. Men and women I find are attracted to the exact same things when it comes to personality. Men and women both like confidence, sence of humor and playfulness, charm and the whole package. I will tell you to do the same thing that a man who asks me this same question would get. Be friends with everyone you meet, doesn't matter where you are you never know if you'll see that person again. But what that is is good practice for being friends with everyone. Then there is flirting. For me I flirt with everyone, other straight guys, fat girls, old women, gay guys, gay girls, trannys, hobos, I dint care. Flirting doesn't have to go anywhere, it's just practice for when the right one comes along and you will be able to sweep a man off his feet without even trying very hard because you have a lot of practice. It'll make you more comfortable with yourself around anyone because you know how to talk to everyone and hell you probably made a complete ass out of yourself but you did that with someone you may never see again so it isn't a big deal to you anymore because shit let me tell you I've made myself out to be a complete idiot a million times but when it mattered I was ready and if I screwed up I used my sence of humor to fix it. Even if you get rejected, take it well and just laugh about it. It'll make you more attractive and it'll make it far less embarrassing for you. I hope that helps, if you have any questions feel free to private message me. Life is like a game of chess, you will never get better if you don't play with people who have more experience then you. I have to say I play chess like a pro if you get my meaning.

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    • I don't seem to be desperate. Been extremely patient and also i am enjoying being single it's just a question that has been popping up recently lol

    • Hey if you need a friend I'm here for you wink wink. Private message me if you are bored.

    • Lol will do! (:

  • You really just have to get to know more people and get lucky and find someone whom you are compatible with. For me, "friends of friends" worked. :p

    Don't forget that if you actually like a guy, it is a wise choice to seem at least remotely interested. Hugging the person can help.

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    • Oh trust I do initiate. I'm super confident in that. And I do believe in not making the guy do alllll the work so i just don't understand lol

    • I guess you just need to find a guy who you like and likes you back?

    • Yea I believe so lol

  • Ask: where does the kind of guy you want to meet hang out? Who does he hang out with? What is a guy who you feel you can support his mission 100%? The you will know where he will be

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  • He will come through, just give it time. Judging by your profile pic you are a pretty girl. You don't have problems, you'll find the right guy or he will find you.

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    • Aww thank you! (: but let me just say he needs to step on it! He is taking to long lol 😝

    • I know i am looking for a a companion to. It's hard to find someone.

  • i feel you cause i'm in the same predicament, i have a full time and part time job but i always ponder when will i find THE one. I get jelly when i notice couples around me but i no i need patience for it, positive thinking and fosho i'll find her or rather she'll find me :) enjoy while being single, YOLO haha:)

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    • Hahaha!!! For real though!!! My friends are having babies and getting married Geez HAHAHAHA! Struggle is real!!! Goodluck to you in finding ur queen (:

    • haha same here 8)

  • looking at your display, pic i can't understadn why u can't get a partner. I mean u look gorgeous and hot. I guess you need to be a bit more social and show the guys u r really interested. Maybe u r being shy.

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    • Shy? Lol not even I compliment men aswell never scared of doing that. Lol might feel dorky telling them ha! But nope I think I just tend to be too busy :/

    • And thank u!!! ☺️

  • There is nothing wrong with you. I guess, sometimes you need to stop searching for something and it will just come. It sounds cliche, but it works. Because, then you are most relaxed, more natural etc. You look like a really nice girl, pretty, outgoing, so nothing wrong with you.

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  • What's the problem is not you; but the guy. Finding a decent guy is tough; wants even harder is a guy having enough guts to ask you out. Sometimes a person shines so bright that people get scared

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    • Awww thanks! (: but I try not to make them feel that way either u know lol :( like I might have a strong personality but I always pick up vibes and see what's up and still nothing lol

    • You remind me of myself and a lot of my female friends. Everyone asks themselves at one point during their life when they would find the one, and there no real good answer.

      One stragtey that seems to work for them is to ask the guy out themselves, I'm like why wait for him to ask you when you can ask him out, lol. They recently gone on dates with their respective crushs.

    • Yup I do and nothing I tend to get the guy that wants to toot it and boot it lol

  • It happens when you least expect it... So don't expect it lol

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    • Oh trust I have no hopes but man! Tooooo long being like this though hahaha

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    • Bahaha I like that! And thanks again! (:

    • No problem

  • The right guy for you could be right under your nose. I know it's winter and everyone buns up in the winter but don't worry, it'll happen

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    • Lol thank u I appreciate ur words (:

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    • Cool! Then why no serious relationship?

    • U tell me lol

  • At least you are giving an effort. I never try to do anything which obviously results in me always being single

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  • hmmmm sometimes the perfect guy could be a friend who has always liked you but never realised and maybe you should just not try so hard and wait abit longer for a guy to find you

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  • I'm just kinda waiting until uni is over before I find a girlfriend.

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    • See I'm on that boat to but things like that happen even when ur finishing up goals in life too

  • Im right here. Juz gimme a call hunny ;3

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    • I already know how to be everything including the Brian Ull just have to be strong enough to learn how to train in everything before it comes to dating me (; lol

    • so ur planning to rape meh if im weak u say? D=
      i think im gonna have a nosebleed Dx
      its like a dream come true. please sumbooty wake meh up! >.<

  • If that's your real picture I'd say there's nothing wrong with you

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  • Honestly things like this sort happen when we least expect them. Try to stay less focused on this and keep your focus on what you do already.

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  • Your soul mate is out there, don't rush it or you'll end up with the wrong one. And you will regret it later on in life when you realize, he wasn't the one.

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    • Thanks for ur kind words (: it made me think. But my "soulmate" is taking forever lmao I'm joking haha but yes I hope he will come during the right time (:

  • hey.. i will tell you wht to do... just take break! go on a vacation (alone) do whtevr you want meet new people and make new frnds!!

    bcz u sound stressed in your question!!

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    • U know I have been thinking about doing that lately haha! Thanks I think I might just do it (:

  • Without meeting you and seeing your past relationships, there's no way to tell.

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  • Well nothing based off your pic but it seems you are always busy, you think that maybe a factor?

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    • I think it's part of it but still lol I go to college and meet new people everyday at my job. So idk? Lol

    • Maybe it is just not the right moment in your life. Sometimes love come when you least expect it.

    • Yeaaaah *sigh* too long though lol

  • BUT when? Where is he?

    I just came down to answer your Prayers.

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  • Just trying to get lvl 2 since this bitch site won't let you post links at lvl 1 sorry

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  • looking for the right guy
    yes, It's like that, you are not sure if he is the right person, i guess
    but, soon you will find this Mr. Right guy
    Don't worry :)

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  • Maybe you are too picky and too busy? Maybe you are not in a good area to find a good man but if that pic is really you and there are good available men in your region there is an underlying problem that cannot be deciphered from the words in your question.

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    • Not picky at all I'm open to all. If I don't feel the spark of some sort then I can't proceed but it's usually the that doesn't want to talk anymore lol which is fine lol busy might be the case but I meet new people all the time at my job and yes that is really me lol

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    • haha , i think she should give it some time
      She is not sure, if she should commit to a relationship, She needs more time to separate work and other life,
      give it time, take a good decision :)

    • oh no, I am ready for one but the ones that have been haven't step up to the plate or they just don't know what THEY want (:

What Girls Said 3

  • HAHA omg im so like you, if only someone could give me the awnsers, please let me know :p
    Im 22 and never had a bf, i go to college and i work and im fun to be around but i always end up alone.
    Last guy i dated in January he was amazing but timing sucked and nothing developed.. so now im stuck and think okay he doesn't exist im going to continue living my life alone.

    But to be honest im growing as a person and im learning, so hopefully when i met a guy and if i meet a guy i would like him to be my future husband, i know its lame but i dont like dating bunch of guys just to date, if i go on a date with someone i find interesting im not doing it just to get laid

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    • I mean guys do ask me out but they are the ones i dont like, and i know im not going to want something serious with them so i dont go on dates.

    • I'm ur age as well. Many people think like I have all the time in the world too and im like 0. o lol. Don't get me wrong being single it is fun just been a tad bit too long.

      I like the idea of dating my "future husband" infact I think that's what I look for without even knowing lol. Like if there is no spark there is no point to proceed the date. But what I have been getting is a lot of guys that are smooth talkers and I just catch them in their game and then no more talking lol

  • Nothing's wrong with you lol. You're pretty & from what I can tell on here, you seem like a sweetheart.

    The thing is, you're a student & you work. I'm a student & I have a job as well, so I know how that goes. So the thing is... you're busy. I'm sure you don't have time to hang out constantly. Unfortunately, prince charming isn't gonna break into your house so unless you make yourself physically available, your chances of meeting a variety of men goes way down.

    I'm not saying that it's impossible to meet a man while you're working & in school, but I don't think right now is the best time to put a lot of focus on it. Once you finish school & get the job you want, then you'll have the time to really put yourself out there like you want. But for now, just keep up your appearance, be social, smile, & even try approaching men you like. But be patient. It'd be a strange coincidence if you met a man literally tomorrow lol.

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    • I just feel like I won't have time for that either in the future because I'll be SOO focused on my career it might hurt it.
      I just want something to develope slow kinda like meet someone new be friends and see if go prolongs to a relationship which I hope it does Cuz it has been to long even my mom is like are u dating? If my mom is on my ass then there is something wrong here lol

  • u know what? the more u look for it the less ull find. Just relax... keep going out but dont worrie about finding a nice guy and it will happen,

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