How loaded is a loaded question for guys?

Asked advice about an ex (who is in a year relationship and happy) who always asks how is my love going (even when there is absolutely no direction toward the subject) when we make contact (very platonic). Answer was that men always want to feel like number one, and that the question about how my love life is going, is a loaded questions. My question is loaded with what? Self interest and ego boost, or an interest to actually know about my love and why?


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What Guys Said 2

  • It's a conversation starter. It establishes personal connection and intimacy and gets you thinking about something. Beyond that it doesn't really matter what you answer: Truth or fiction, all the same.

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    • Thanks for the info.. suppose guys just like asking the question without actually wanting to know the answer.

  • It's an off the cuff flirt that he may use on others
    but in your case, I sense also a bit of "self interest/ego" afoot as exs never let go completely.
    It's best to simply flirt back & keep your poker face, cards (love 411) close to your vest (hidden)
    This is a topic NOT for his ears, even via others

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    • Thanks for the response. I avoid topics about relationships or feelings with him. I don't flirt either. I asked him about his Halloween costume. He asked me about mine, I said I went as Catwoman. His response was"Hmmm nice.. I bet you would enjoy dress up sex" To which I pretended I didn't see the text and changed the subject immediately... Was a bit of a shocker, didn't want to respond, didn't feel right since he has a gf. Do guys ALWAYS like testing the waters even if they don't want to swim..

    • Yes, of course and the older they get...
      Eventually guys & some gals consider sexual innuendos and double entendres a form of flirting & ego boost in others... reminiscent of earlier fun sex play days.

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