Am I wrong or is he?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. I love him but I make a lot of excuses for him. I'm gonna make a long story short. He's a jerk. He's a selfish mommas boy. That's just putting it in a nut shell. He's sweet too. He does a lot for me as I do for him too.
He often asks me if I wanna "hang out" after our son goes to bed. That usually means "do you wanna lay and watch tv until someone suggests sex and then go to bed" I always say yes to hanging out.
I often times have things to do after our son goes to bed. Like take a bath or clean up or run to the store real quick. And THEN I can "hang out" but because I don't jump to do what he asks as soon as our son goes to sleep he consideres it blowing him off. He says I wait until it's too late

Well just last night he asks if I wanna "hang out" I said "yes" but I have to take a bath first. I took a bath and washed my hair and shaved my legs and brushed my teeth. Then I was ready. He says I took too long and he went to bed. So NOW he says he's gonna stop asking me to do stuff for example I made breakfast and he didn't eat it. I told him I would go pick up his prescription and he said don't my mom will. And I am just beyond frustrated and I want to know am I wrong? If I say I will hang out with him should I before I do all that extra stuff or is he being ridiculous?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think the two of you are having communication problems. Neither of you are really at fault, you just aren't understanding the other. I have a friend that told me the book "men are from Mars, women are from Venus" saved his marriage, by helping then communicate better. Maybe it might help you.

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    • We usually communicate very well. Lately we haven't been. And I notice it but don't say anything. Every once in awhile we go through this and he will notice and say "why are we always fighting" and then it goes away. I hate it!

    • Sounds like something about your communication needs to be improved if he doesn't even understand why you are fighting.

What Guys Said 4

  • you're not wrong, he just doesn't get it yet.

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    • We are young. And I blame that on a lot of his flaws. We've been together since we were 16/17 and now were 20/21. We've both grown so much and that's why I know there's hope haha.

  • Sounds like a lazy jerk, drop him ASAP find a real man. A father should not be using the phrase "Wanna hang out" and that should not be code for sex either. -1

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    • I can't do though. This is just a fight, there's still WAY too much good in our relationship to do that. I would be devastated

    • Sounds sketchy. I don't know, I would ask him why he is acting that way. You can also tell him you want to bath but he should join you... Two clean bodies are better then one. And you can be playful and fool around and then take it outside.

  • Goddammit... he is a shithead... dump him!

    Find a guy that appreciates you.

    PS... he should have been shaving your legs and sucking your toes. He sounds like a fudging queer. There is NEVER a time limit for loving your girl... QUEER!

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  • Oooooooooh you have a boyfriend? That makes sense now.

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    • By the way yes he is being ridiculous. You of all people deserve to be treated with respect, he is asking like a selfish child in my opinion. I wonder why he Would act that way. It doesn't make any sense because you are a caring thoughtful person and I just don't see why he would do that honestly. He sounds like a selfish lover in my opinion. I know you love him but damn it's rude the way he treats you.

    • Sigh. I never said I didn't have one. Lol

    • Rofl I suppose that's true

What Girls Said 3

  • I don't think it's your fault or his, I think his mood goes off while he waits for you and he may feel like you don't want it as bad as he does. Maybe finding a find to bath before hanging out with him would be great, trying put your son to sleep earlier? Or maybe if possible you could bath before all that? Don't get mad at him for wanted to spend some quality time with you and I understand your needs too.

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    • Yeah I agree. I just think it's mean for him to not let me do things for him that I do all the time. It makes me feel unwanted. As he probably feels when I don't hang out with him. It's a lose lose and I don't know how to fix it.

  • He sounds like he's being a bit ridiculous. Find out why though, especially if this is out of the norm for you guys.

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  • why don't you ask him to put your son to bed wile you shower, find ways to save time. you both just need to learn to compromise. he sounds a little imature too.

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