Is he just looking to hookup?

we've been on 7 dates. he calls me babe and is really nice and flirty towards me. however we aren't officially "boyfriend" and "girlfriend". On our last date things got really touchy and stuff. We didn't have sex though. I'm just not sure his heart is in the right place. I'm a virgin so this is all new to me but I mean he tried hooking up in a car parked in the parking lot. I don't know it all seems sketchy to me. What do you guys think?

Updates:
On the first date we just kissed. but on the second date things got a little touchy. on the third date it got more touchy... but the 7th date just got a whole other level of touching haha I just think its sketchy that I mean his trying to hookup but we aren't officially anything you know

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What Guys Said 2

  • Hmmm. Great question! I think it great a teen cares enough to ask about this. Is he a virgin too? If not, how many partners has he had - and also, if he's not a virgin, when was the last time he had sex, and/or a BJ? (If you can get the answer out of him). Before I know that, I can't nail the reason down, but I can take a stab at it;

    On one hand, seven dates is definitely enough for him to know whether or not he wants to go steady with you, (you should know, too). Also, you should make your wishes known - just don't use that as an ultimatum, ( i. e. - 'I won't have sex with you until you make a commitment to me.' ). That pisses us guys off something fierce. But don't sell yourself short; From they way you 'spoke' here, and what you 'said,' it's obvious that you're a descent chic, with a good head on your shoulders. That being said, I'm sure you know that, with any guy your age, ( I'm assuming he is around your age ), having his heart in it is going to be a rare occurrence, ( especially if he hasn't committed to you yet ). In addition, I'm afraid that, if he is over 18, he might just be using you.

    Now, normally, this wouldn't be THAT big of a deal, but since this will be your first time, it's a whole other deal. I can't say my first time was that important to me, but I know girls are always saying how serious it is to them. That being said, we both know how horrible it would be if you were to give yourself to him, and then have him leave, and not come back to you. So, I'd say your instincts are correct - it is a little sketchy. Even in the best case, you shouldn't let him have you anyway if he's not ready to say the magic words; 'Boyfriend,' and 'Girlfriend'.

    Keep in mind, that while you're figuring all this out, there plenty of other things you can do to keep him from losing his mind while waiting. (I have to be very careful here, so as not to come off like a pervert, or get my ass arrested.) But have him study up prior, so so get something out of it.

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  • Personally I think if he was only after sex he would not have stuck around for 7 dates. You really dident give me much enough to go off of though. Why does it feel sketchy?

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    • On the first date we just kissed. but on the second date things got a little touchy. on the third date it got more touchy... but the 7th date just got a whole other level of touching haha I just think its sketchy that I mean his trying to hookup but we aren't officially anything you know

    • Just because he wants sex does not mean that's all he wants. You need to take other things into consideration as well. Does he want to do other things with you too or just kissing/sexual stuff?
      There is nothing wrong with you not wanting sex, but there is nothing wrong with him wanting it either. If you are not ready for the type of relationship he wants maybe he is not the one for you.

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