Why don't guys look at me, or find me attractive?

I've never been looked at by a guy, no one ever approaches me even though I put myself together really well and I smile a lot. I'm not extremely extroverted but my friends always get hit on by guys even though they aren't either. This really hurts my self esteem because I am a bigger girl and I wanna feel appreciated as a woman. It really sucks hearing about all of the guys my friends have had to 'let down' because they're not good enough for them when I'm not even getting looked at.. What's wrong with me? Am I ugly?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You can't possibly have never been looked at so lets strike that hyperbole right there. You've been looked at, probably more than you know.

    Perhaps its the places you are hanging out or perhaps it is as simple as your weight; however, plenty of men date women who are heavier so weight alone can't be it. based on the little I see in your picture you are cute. perhaps you could try approaching guys or making more eye contact so that a guy knows you are interested... also keep in mind that guys can be intimidated to approach girls in large groups

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    • You know, That does make sense, and lol at the hyperbole :) I do think I might try speaking up more. Thank you for the comment :)

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What Guys Said 6

  • guys dont look at you GIRLS dont look at me smh @faithdanielle

    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1208847-how-can-i-improve-my-looks-im-ugly-itseems

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  • If you feel unconfident about your weight then you should try joining a gym. It would definitely help boost your self-esteem.

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  • Do you look at people?

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  • You are not ugly. Your friends may be exaggerating the number of guys they let down. A lot of women think any guy that is nice to them was hitting on them. I have over heard women talk about how I liked them to their friends when I did not have any romantic feelings for them at all.

    A lot of shy guys actually are only comfortable around women we don't like, and are often mistaken for liking those girls. Since we don't like them we aren't nervous around them and feel like we can joke around without worrying about what they think about us. So the girls we don't like end up thinking we like them, and the girls we do like never have a clue. It can be a really be problem for shy people. :(

    You have a vagina, which means that are you are being approached by some guys even if they aren't guys you are interested in. Most likely your shyness gives the false impression that you don't like these guys back, as is often the case with shy people. So the guy turns around and leaves before asking you out. Rejection hurts so most guys need to know the girl is already interested before asking her out. If your shyness causes them to think you don't like them, then they won't ask you out. You may not even realize that you were approached. Instead you will just mistake them as being friendly and having a conversation with you.

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  • Your fine the way you are and dont take to much to heart what your friends say, deep down they feel the same as you

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  • "I've never been looked at by a guy"
    Not true. Even the ugliest girls get looked at, if only to think "God damn that's ugly"

    "no one ever approaches me" "I'm not extremely extroverted "
    Those things go hand in hand.

    "I am a bigger girl"
    There's the issue right there.

    Stop expecting the world to treat you as if you were a skinny girl when you're not one.
    Thin girls might get young guys approaching them. Larger girls have to work harder at it, and just saying to yourself that you're not extremely extroverted is no solution.

    Work on your social skills. Get out of your skin. Work on your flirting skills. Learn to be extroverted.

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    • Wow, firstly, What's wrong with being bigger? You're saying it as though it's the worst thing in the world. How am I "eexpecting the world to treat me as though I'm a thin girl?" What the hell does that even mean? Plenty of thick women get hit on all the time. You sound very ignorant. It's people like you who make girls like me feel like shit. Very negative

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    • @Cleveland, thank you - You reaffirm my faith in the ladies.

    • okay I really don't care that much about what you have to say, mostly because you're obviously bitter and want someone to agree with you.

What Girls Said 3

  • what kind of facial expression do you normally have on your face? you might have a cold expression on your face without realising it and that drives people away. extroverted has nothing to do with it. i am completely introverted in all possible ways and many guys still approach me even though i don't think i am attractive, just average. if you yourself feel that being a bigger girl is a problem, work out a bit. not because you want guys to hit on you, but because it will be better for your health. you need to give the impression that you are a girl who knows how to take care of herself. plus, studies have shown before that sometimes, too much weight will be bad for your legs and feet in the future and you will feel pain in your legs, knees, and feet in the future. and you won't be able to balance yourself properly in the future. so working out is a good way to take care of yourself. i'm not going to sugar-coat this for you, because you are at least 18 years old. but your bigger size may tell people that you do not care enough to take care of yourself, and guys look for fit women because it shows they are capable of taking care of themselves and will be a good mother to their children because of this. it's not simply because they look "hot." "hot" is just the outer layer. even naturally thin girls with high metabolism make sure to work out or exercise to keep themselves healthy. really thin girls may work out to gain some muscles because although they are thin, they may be physically weak. too thin and too thick are two extremes that must be taken care of through working out. working out will keep all acne away from you. eat healthily, it is important and will make your skin look healthier too (less oil on skin if that is a problem). any NEVER use make-up. it is seriously bad for your skin. if you don't use make-up, it shows you are confident about how you are naturally. dress comfortably, but not like you've been working out or just woke up, and respectably.

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  • no you look fine... maybe you are targetting the wrong type of guys

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  • Same, apart from a 15 yr old whom im pretty sure already asked half of my school (and he doesn't even go here >.>)

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