I've been talking to/hanging out with my best friends ex boyfriend, I like him and feel really guilty. Advice please!!!?

Ok so, i recently just got out of a 3 year relationship that ended in my ex boyfriend getting arrested for punching and choking me. one of my best friends dated this guy for 2 years and they broke up almost 2 years ago. i don't know how this happened, but we became friendly over the summer after having some issues with each other and now i think i have feelings for him, and he feels the same way. I've been secretly talking to him and hanging out with him behind all my friends backs and i feel terrible. i know i need to tell my best friend because our friendship is important to me. she has a new boyfriend who she is madly in love with, but she is very controlling and possessive and i know she will be furious when i break this news to her.

i feel like a horrible person/friend because i know ex boyfriends are supposed to be "off limits" and i never expected for this to happen or even wanted it to... it just did. how do i tell her? should i stop talking to him completely even though i really like him?

thank you for any advice!! im really struggling here !


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Most Helpful Girl

  • If she didn't date him as long as she did this would be bad but not as bad. Two years is a long time to be with someone. Not to mention if you were friends when they were dating you probably were around them in couole mode. I personally would never even talk to my friends ex. I know it sounds childish but it's girlcode. You can either pick him or her. There will be no way you can be friends and be with her ex. Doesn't make her possessive, I don't think anyone would want to hangout or see their ex again, let alone with one of their friends. Also if you have to hide things and talk in secret that's an obvious indicator that it is WRONG. If you didn't want Her to make a big deal about it you shouldn't of acted shady and secretive.

    Easy answer- it's your friendship or her ex

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What Guys Said 1

  • instead of telling her you have been hanging out with him, try asking her what she thinks about you two being together first, you're most likely gonna get a lie, but as long as she says its okay, it won't matter. plus you two are allowed to hangout as friends.

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What Girls Said 2

  • It isn't right. You have to choose one. You can't have both. And it's horrible and not fair but that's how it is

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  • Hope you get your answer. Send it to me when you get it. ✌️

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