Why would she want to hang out with my Cousin?

My soon to be ex wife is heading to see her parents and wants to catch up to my female cousin which she has spoken to maybe twice the whole time that we were married . Why would she want to do this ?

  • She is trying to get my family to side with her during our divorce
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  • She is thinking about getting back together.
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  • She has lost her mind
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  • I don't have a clue about the workings of this women
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Updates:
If you have read this question, do me a favor and give me some feed back . I am willing to listen to any answer at this point

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's possible that she wants to start a friendship with your cousin so that she can be close to you without being with you . Maybe she thinks that this will be a way of keeping tabs on you . It's sounds psychotic, but my friend's ex did this by becoming "best friends" with his sister . She would make it a point to come over and make things awkward when he'd bring another girl around . So watch out for that and good luck hun .

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    • I would agree with that, and thanks for the answer . But some more information that might change your mind . We have a two year old son together so I wouldn't think that she would have any problem keeping tabs on me . Does that changes things, or do you still think that she is trying to keep close without being together . PS - Nice pic

    • Well I'm sure she doesn't want to bring your son in the middle by using him to keep tabs on you, because that's just not healthy for him . So using your cousin is still plausible .

    • That is understandable, but I really am not that close to my cousin at all. We maybe talk like once a year.

What Girls Said 3

  • I don't agree with any of these;

    it could just simply be she needs some female support ! The inner ! Yeah, she may never have spoken to her for longer than necessary before, but in times of traumatic stress like a divorce, women reach out to anybody willing to listen .

    it could just be they happened to chat on the phone the other day, and she decided to follow up with talking and getting emotional support !

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    • That makes sense, the only problem is that she doesn't have any contact information on my cousin . Plus me just moved to ND in the summer, and she is the one working while I was attending school . So she has tons of female co-workers that I have never met that she can talk to .

  • Maybe she wants so support off someone who knows you well and is inside your family. She can also keep tabs on what your up to and if you are in any new relationships. She could possibly think that if she becomes really good friends with your cousin then she could tell her about what you are up to. But is your cousin likely to do that?

    Also, who ended the marriage? If it was your wife then she has probably done this to keep an eye on you. But if it was you, then she could think that in some way this could get her closer to you, or even back with you.

    It really depends on the situation.

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    • My wife was the one who ended the marriage on Christmas Eve right after I flew in with our son after spending two weeks visiting her parents and mine. My cousin is blunt and she has told me a couple of times that she really doesn't think my wife is doing the right thing.

    • Your wife is probably trying to find things out from your cousin by the sounds of it. But I'm sure, as you probably have already assumed, that you don't have a lot to worry about if your cousin thinks that.

  • Well, I am NOT sure why she would even talk to your cousin but I think she's just trying to manipulate you ? . Maybe . Trying to get you to the point where you are wondering exactly what you asked : Why is she hanging out with your cousin . " I think you should talk to her about this . And ask her WHY ? The best answer I can suggest is that she's trying to grab sides ORR she needs someone to talk to about this .

    Please DO talk to her about it or your cousin . Good luck !

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What Guys Said 1

  • Tough to say . Maybe she just likes your cousin, despite not knowing her very well ? I guess it depends on how bitter you think she is about the upcoming divorce . She might be trying to win their favor, it's not clear whether she's the type of person who would turn the proceedings into a smear campaign .

    You might consider talking with your cousin before and after her visit, or you could simply ask your soon-to-be ex about why she wants to visit, though I understand that could be difficult .

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    • Would you answer change if I add the information that she is the one that cheated on me twice and is the one that wants the divorce . I wanted to try and work things out .

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    • Thanks, I have been very calm about everything . I was just asking because a few weeks ago my best friend was in town and she wanted all of us to go to dinner and hang out . She has zero relationship with him and he was never both of our friends . Keep in mind that she hasn't wanted anything to do with me since she moved out in January . I think that she cheated on me because she thought I would then want to get a divorce . It seems to me she didn't want to make the decision to end everything .

    • That's probably a reasonable assumption . Sort of like someone who shoots at the police so that the police will shoot them--forcing someone else to cope with the dirty work .

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