I feel conventional dating is coercive and compromising, what are your thoughts? *read details*?

Well dating today (for guys) usually consist of finding a girl ur at least attracted to and seeing if there's a possibility of a relationship

Whereas there's the less common more romantic side of falling for a girl and then trying to get her to fall for you (something that's more typical in movies)


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Most Helpful Guy

What Girls Said 2

  • Most guys are jerks. All they want is a pretty girl who can satisfy their sexual and visual appetite. That is exploitation and usury and most men won't even marry the girl that is providing them with sex..

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    • "usury"

      That word doesn't mean what you think it means.

  • I agree, dating is irritating. Especially if it's sort of random or even an all out blind date. It seems way too forced. If I find a guy attractive and worthwhile, we'll hang out for a little then have sex and we usually grow on each other from there. It's not the most orthodox method, but it works for me. Point is, do what makes you feel more comfortable. It'll all work out yo

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    • Yea, imagine you force a relationship with some random guy and then start to feel for someone whose been there the whole time, someone who may have a crush on you

What Guys Said 2

  • Movies have always been a lie! It has never been like that, don't be fooled. Dating has changed, but if you want it more like the movies, it is really up to you to make it happen. I think I am very romantic and I love passion more than anything, I have had it in all my relationships, but none of them happened like in the movies. There have been "movie moments" I guess. But movies are so far removed from reality.

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    • Yes ur right, I'm not saying I'm some movie prince but I'm just not a fan of trying to approach random girls, i might say a girl is hot and a friend says ask her out, but in my mind I'm like "why? She's just another hot chick"

    • Ok, well no one is asking you do to that. It may be harder to find what you are looking for. I am the exact opposite as you. I love dating, meeting new people, seeing what works what doesn't.

    • That's a good thing and yes obviously my way wouldn't work for you

      I do love meeting new people, i just can't ask a girl out cause she's single and attractive enough, i need a connection

  • The second is actually more coercive. Think of it this way: You find a person you like and fall for, which is nothing more than emotional infatuation, and then make all the effort in the world to get this person to see how amazing you are. In movies this is excellent because it tends to work out and the hero and the heroine hook up and have babies; in real life this is really, really rare and can lead to stalking behavior. Worse yet it does happen very often but not the way you think it; if the female falls first you will find her being far more preoccupied and driven to making "him" fall for her pushing extremely hard.

    The first is at least open-ended. It doesn't lead to anything other than acceptance of the answer whether it is yes or no.

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    • I feel the "stalking" is an extreme, if she doesn't like u she doesn't like you, movies are just the closest example

      I feel like the first relationship is just filled with two parties that don't fit trying to force something force something and most of the time those relationships fall apart whether it takes them week, months, or years to realize it

      It stems from people being together soely to avoid being alone

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    • I concede! T_T Please? Am I to be condemned to more of this?

    • Everyone should have there day and be allowed to reply when adressed i did no more

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