How long would it take you to be ready to date again after a long term relationship? (at least over 4 years)?

I'm dealing with a guy who has big issues about it because his first and only one lasted 8 years and ended about a year ago. he really likes me, says he could fall in love with me, but he can not give me definitive answers right now. have you been in this situation? have you been no the other end? how long did it take you? (I asked another question about this last night actually) Be honest, thanks.

  • it would probably take over a year, between 1-3, if I really liked the person (that I started seeing after) I would be honest but it would be hard to stay away from them
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  • it wouldn't take me much time, probably 6-12 months and I would be ok
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  • if my first and only one ended and lasted that long it would probably take 5+ years even if i really liked the person I had begun to have feelings for
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And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
so because I'm in this situation I obviously want to know what I should do, I don't want it to be a matter of waiting, we've known each other a long time and tried off and on but because of his issues it has ended, he tries to come back, but the same issues are still there. I don't want to think of it as waiting, but i don't know how to be chill about having it not be an actual relationship.
to these guys saying it wouldn't take you very long, have you been in long term relationships that have lasted longer than 4 years?

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What Guys Said 1

  • It really depends on the person... If he is having a hard time getting over an ex, all you can do is give him time and space. He was obviously pretty deeply in love with her.

    I have a friend who took a year or two to get over his first gf, and hey had been together 2 years. It really destroyed him. On the other hand, after I ended a 5 year relationship I was able to date again a few months later.

    If you are already a bit off and on, then it might be that he just doesn't want it to get serious yet.

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What Girls Said 1

  • If I were ever single again it would take me a very very long time to date someone new.

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    • even if you met some one you really liked?

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    • what went on when you weren't official, was it not exclusive?

    • that's really kind of what I'm dealing with now

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