My boyfriend just told me he is going back to main campus in January?

So my boyfriend has been taking classes online and at a regional campus since we started dating, today he told me that he is going back to stay on main campus in January. Main campus is only about an hour away but he currently lives 15 minutes away, it is going to kill me not being able to see him as often as I do. Do I have a right to be upset about this? (Partly since he has known for months and didn't tell me) Not sure how i'm going to be able to handle it, I currently spend at least 4-5 nights a week with him, any suggestions?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Part of being in a relationship is supporting your partner in pursuing/reaching their goals. Sometimes that means compromise or sacrifice. Spending less time together sucks, but it's not the end of the world.

    Sure, you can be upset. I'd be upset about having to spend less time with my partner too. But being upset about it shouldn't include being mad at him, guilt-tripping him, or anything like that. I think that the attitude should be more: I'm upset that we're not going to be able to spend as much time together, but I still support you in your decision.

    The fact that he knew for months and didn't tell you, however, is a separate issue. Communication is important in a relationship, and keeping secrets from each other is detrimental. This is his decision, but it is something that's going to affect both of you/your relationship. He should have been open about it. The question is: Why did he keep it secret from you? Was it that he wasn't sure about his decision and didn't want to upset you prematurely? Was it that he just didn't think or care to discuss it with you? Was it that he knew you would be upset and try to talk him out of it?

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    • As much as I would like to attempt to talk him out of it I know this is something he needs to do and I don't plan on making him feel guilty or being mad at him, I am just upset I don't get to see him. We have just never really been apart for a long period of time and most of my friends are away at college to so he is really the only person I have around anymore, so when he leaves, it's just going to be hard. He didn't tell me because he knew it would upset me and didn't want to do that.

    • I totally get it. One of my previous boyfriends joined the military reserves while we were together, which meant he would be gone for months at a time for training. It was really tough, but we made it work. We sent each other lots of snail mail, had the occasional phone call when we could. The two of you will likely have even more avenues for communicating with each other (like phone and skype). I used the time we had apart to better myself---I joined a gym with my mom and lost some weight, I picked up some of my hobbies again (that I had been neglecting because I spent so much of my time with him), I cultivated new friendships.

What Guys Said 1

  • Sounds like he wants to try out other girls. Sorry

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What Girls Said 0

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