Me & this girl have obvious interests in each other. Her ex is still in & out of the pic. Our compatibilty is the best we've both ever had. So?

Me & this girl started talking a lot. She was single at the time cause her & her ex couldn't work stuff out. We talked all day every day like we've known each other for years. Our compatibility is incredible. We knew of each other but never talked or hung out. Anyways we both start liking each other it escalated into sexting & sending naked pics. But she always mentioned that her piece of shit ex is still around. We are honest & always tell each other things. We have an understanding. So all of a sudden one weekend she doesn't respond to my texts. I think I did something wrong, so I call her. Come to find out her ex begged her back & he saw all our conversations & he blocked me. Anyways, on that phone call we talked for an hour & a half like nothing happened. Great chemistry. I understand she did this to see if they should be forever done. She feels like she needs to help him. He pulls the "im nothing w/o you card." She's got a big heart. We agree to not let him ruin us. We didn't flirt/cross lines after they get back together. He starts doing the same stuff again. She asks me to lunch one Thurs. First time hanging out. Went amazing. The next day we're supposed to hang out again, but he surprises her & begs her back again. She tells me & I get upset at the guy not her. We talk & I tell her I'm struggling to fight my feelings & Im afraid I'm gonna cross boundaries. Cheating isn't cool. She makes me promise to not do that cause she doesn't wanna lose me. That next day, they have a HUGE fight. They break up. We meet up to grab drinks. Just as friends. Have a great time. By time we leave the restaurant she's rubbing my shoulder holding my hands, stuff like that. I offer to drive cause she wanted to still hang out, so I did. As soon as get in her car it was like what had been building up finally came. We grab each other & start making out. After that she stayed the night. We had sex that following morning being sober & we talk still with ease. Will we ever be together?

Updates:
She is back with the boyfriend it seems for good. We don't talk much anymore. Almost 2 weeks since we last talked. She says she loves him and wants to eventually get married. He's 32 and doesn't want kids or a marriage. I hate that for her... Oh well, I'll let her come back and make an effort if she does, great. If not, oh well. Sucks that our friendship is going away though. I'm not gonna bother their relationship though...

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What Girls Said 1

  • How long have you both been talking like this? If I were in your shoes, I'd give her a little more time to work it out with him, without pressuring her. Once a few weeks have passed, if she hasn't decided exactly what she is doing with her ex, you might have to take a risk and ask her to make a choice. Not an ultimatum, per se, but maybe just say, "I can't keep seeing you, while you're still seeing him. It's confusing to me and hurts." Be honest with her about your feelings. This is exactly what my boyfriend said to me when we were in this position. I realized I was hurting him and didn't want to lose him, and I made a choice. I left my ex for good and we have been together over a year now. Good luck!

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