Met a nice guy but too scared to commit?

Met a really nice guy who is very sweet and says lovely things and who I seem to get on well with but after a very nasty break up over a year ago I am very reluctant to take things further than the couple of dates we have been on for fear of it ending badly? any help would be great


0|0
1|5

Most Helpful Guy

  • See, this is the big problem. I understand what and why you are like this, but stop being too insecure. This guy is nice. Of course you should watch for flags with any partner, but stop. Your just gonna be ruining your chances in terms of dating and hurting guys like this. Don't play around and like him and then out of insecure leave him or zone him. Don't overthink it. Just go for it

    0|0
    0|0
    • I have definitely had a case previously where I did end up zoning him out and did not feel good about doing it to him but like you say out of my own insecurity did it anyway. I think this one may be different so am going to just go for it but be honest about why I feel nervous about getting into it and hopefully if he is as nice as I think he will be happy to take things slowly.

What Guys Said 4

  • Well if you don't take any risks you'll never get any reward.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I think if you were honest with him, and tell him you want to take it slow he would appreciate that. Whatever you do, don't leave him out in the cold and stop communication with him - he'll think it was his fault.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Thanks for the advice. I will speak to him honestly next time we meet

  • People move on, you should too.

    0|0
    0|0
  • He's a nice guy, but you'll get bored of him trust me.

    0|0
    0|1

What Girls Said 1

  • Many of today's toms are sporadic, unpredictable and grow cold duck feet whenever feeling scared and cornered and tend to run quickly back into the murky waters from which they came from when even Hearing or surmising Some squawking when it comes To-----Reluctant to take things further themselves.
    In your case, You have started the ball rolling in your own mind in being afraid to get hooked at the hip, sweetie... I don't blame you one bit. And even though he is whispering sweet somethings in your ear, dear, doesn't mean he wants to Commit tomorrow... he may want to take it easy for awhile.
    Go slow with his flow. Continue for now to not wear your heart so on your sleeve. Life is a gamble, no guarantee as you know. If you really like him, then get to know one another better by slowly nursing and nurturing a Friendship first, then let's see if old Mother Nature has more in store for a ripe ol romance down the row.
    Rome wasn't built in a day. With you in fear of getting too close for comfort, should he mention romance, then just set the record straight that you are not looking for anything heavy right now, so it doesn't go down a beaten path or end up a War of the Roses that gets Snipped and Nipped before it has had a chance to see if it will grow with joe... the ball is in your court...
    Good luck. xx

    0|0
    0|0
    • Thank you. I will try to take all this on board

    • Great and with this, you may find you both end up good ship mates.:)) xxoo

Loading...