She likes me but is still grieving over her ex-boyfriend?

I don't know what to do, I like this girl more than you know but she is still "in-love" with her boyfriend. He passed away a couple years ago and she isn't over him. (That came out wrong, but you understand what I mean't) She likes me and I like her, but she doesn't know what to do. She talks to me about it a lot, but she always gets so emotional when we talk.

I know most of you will say that I should move on, but I love this girl so much. We talk about doing things together one day, then a couple days later she's crying because she misses him. I feel so bad, I don't know what to do..


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Most Helpful Girl

  • She is is still in 'Mourning' over her the Ghost from the past, sweetie, so Anyone right now, would be nothing but a Rebound Robert. She isn't done licking her war wounds, hasn't 'Moved on' herself and isn't really trying to, it seems... she would rather wallow in self pity and past tears and fears than to Try and find even a closure to her fairy tale ending That----Doesn't seem to be ending right now.
    Go with the flow for now and accept things as they are. If you are so hellbent on being by her side, being her Life line, then there is no talking you out of it. However, if you find that she is rattling your cage to the point where it seems hopeless and this is just going up in thin air, slowly start focusing on your own life so you don't have to die, ending up with a broken heart.
    Good luck. xx

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    • Very true, it just sucks because there is something between us but we can't act on it because of how much she misses him. Probably is best if I just move on.

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    • Glad I can make you feel better... and if she would finally see it, I think someday you would have someone more deserving.:)) xx

    • Thank you, sweetie, for allowing me to help shed some light here... hoping you feel better soon.:)) xxoo

What Girls Said 6

  • When I first started hanging out with my bf he wanted to rush me into a relationship even though I said I wasn't exactly ready yet. I didn't want to tell him it was because I was still getting over my ex. But one night I decided he was worth it, so I said yes to being his gf. The first little while of dating him, I still had some feelings for my ex & wondered if I'd get over him completely. But after a little more time with my bf, I ended up falling so hard for him & now I couldn't care less about any other guy unless they're just a friend.

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  • Yeah i know its hard, i also lost the guy i loved. I still miss him now and then, even though it happened in 2008.
    Just be there for her, and take it slow =)

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  • Girls never forget easily , you have to look for reasons to make that guy special for her and try to take his place never show her your sad cuz of that ex (I wish she will get over it) ps: don't take her to places that she went to with her ex boyfriend

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    • I can't take his place though. We're two completely different people, I don't want to change into him to fill in what she's missing.

    • I understand that you can try take her to a holiday or something outside of that place you are in , help her to get over it and good luck

  • Always be there for her. It's hard but believe me. Most of the time it work.

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    • This gives me some hope, thanks.

  • You don't have to feel bad. This isn't your fault. Moving on takes time. It must be really hard on her and on you too seeing her like this. The best thing you can do is be there for her. But be yourself. Give it time..

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    • I just feel bad because I know how much she loved him, I get it. They were really in love before he passed, and would still be together.. but yeah, I'm trying. Thank you.

  • I think you should definitely give it a shot/ Why move on? Sad as it is, her ex is gone, he's not coming back, its not like a living ex where she could be in contact with him and possibly have a chance in the future.
    If you two both admit liking each other, why not try and take it real slow, maybe be friends at first with the potential for something romantic later on?
    Everyone grieves differently. In actuallity, she will emotionally really never be over him. But millions of people lost loved ones only to remarry and live wonderful lives.
    In time it will get better for her. I promise you that.

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    • I get what you're saying, I agree. I try not to think about the fact that he's gone so I have a chance, that just feels wrong to me. We hang out all, the time but for now I am taking it slow. We're just in a odd position right now.

What Guys Said 2

  • You'll have to try to take his place. This is the most difficult thing you'll probably ever have to do. Try to be for her what he was.

    Maybe this won't work, but it's your only chance.

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  • Herm... the exboyfriend is gone, he is dead. It has been 2 years, if she can't get over it, you need to move on man.

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    • I don't think, it's a fact you do got to check that.

    • Well love isn't something you get over easily. They were still in a happy relationship before he passed.

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