I've seen some genuinely nice and sensitive guys?

I've seen some pretty decent guys online and around my older siblings house but around school they all act stereotypically, the same.

Why do some guys act like this? I know they have hearts and care even though they act careless. Why not show their feelings?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You understand a lot of guys are brought up believing they have to keep their emotions in check? That remaining strong & confident is what guys, according to much of society, is what we're suppose to do? That we can't afford to be insecure or weak?
    Truth is, guys feel everything you feel. We can feel unsure, scared, weak, insecure, devastated, broken, sometimes wanting to cry. We just try, really hard, not show those weaknesses. And despite popular belief among a lot of girls, the vast majority of us do care... we, most times, just don't show it as you do.

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    • Yes, I understand Where you're coming from and im glad to hear from a guys perspective of guys complex feeling developments

What Guys Said 10

  • Because most guys actually are nice, just like girls are.

    It's just that many girls have their internal conflict where their brain wants a nice guy but their instincts want a bad boy. The smart guys know that being nice usually get you nowhere in the attraction department. You can only start to show the nice, tender and emotional side to a girl once you've already made her attracted to you.

    There's always exceptions to the rule but this is pretty commonplace.

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  • One simple answer to this... Conditioning.
    Conditioned from the moment we are born... by parents, by siblings, classmate/peers, video games, tv etc. Telling us what we should or shouldn't do, what we can or can't do, and how to act or how not to act. All depending on gender. I don't think conditioning stops till around the early 20's to late 20's depending on how quickly you get irritated with the double standard or how comfortable you become in your own skin.
    You say guys should show their feelings right? if you were to see a guy crying, you as an sensitive person may sympathize but thats one out the how many billion other not-so-sensitive females that just poke fun, and call names, and no one likes that no matter how many times you chant "sticks and stones".
    I say if you are "nice and sensitive" guy/person, don't try to be the other... im not sure if that works vice versa though lol. no one likes a jerk, no mature person anyway.

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  • Some guys/ girls act different online than they do in real life
    than when you meet them in real life they are totally different
    never fails to happen..

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  • Here is the two things that would explain it to me.
    1. This is probably the biggest reason, you are under 18 encountering over 18 people online. The older guys get the more they start to care about you and less about sex. In real life you are probably surrounded by less mature people.
    2. OMG BEWBS! LOOK HOW HOT LOOK HOW COOL I AM FOR SAYING THAT. MY GOD I WOULD DO HER SOOOOO HARD RIGHT GUYS? vs that guy who just minds his own life and would have a normal chat with you if given the chance rather then exposing his heart right up front. He will be the kind of guy to expose himself as the friendship gets closer.

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    • Well, I will admit some guys at school are immature and say silly things , and Yes I have encountered some very mature guys and sometimes I can't decipher genuine from not because I'm around people who aren't most if the time..

  • Because they want to fit in, and also because they think that women want stereotypical "bad boys" and if they show their true feelings women will think they are "balless" or wussy and not want anything to do with them. Honestly, too many women are like that. They act like that around other guys to fit in and have friends.

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  • It's actually all about survival. It is believed (especially in schools among teens) that if you show your feelings you are weak, not worth to call yourself a man. So most of such guys hide what they truly are so they won't be discriminated or made fun of.

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  • You just found another nice guy online :-)
    Haha I don't know, I have a bunch of friends that are cool when we're hanging out, but then try to get them to do anything but sit around and make dirty jokes in public and it's like getting water from a stone.

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    • Cool, it's always good to find another guy thats genuine and nice without fronting for friends. Also it's better you guys joking, and stuff, at. least y'all aren't jerky.. as it sounds

  • When you are a man, showing your feelings is typically seen as a sign of weakness by both our male and female peers.

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    • Hypothetical situation...
      But your friends should respect the way you would treat the girl you care about. If not, they aren't genuine friends.

    • Well this is generally not an issue with me because I can exert my male dominance through force if I have to.

  • Because MOST but not all young chicks don't like nice guys.

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    • I'll admit some girls put on that they don't want nice guys, but it's not true, who wants to be mistreated?

    • Not mistreated in the sense beat up, etc. but many chicks around my age (I am 23) and your age like it when guys are jerks sometimes but actually be a nice guy sometimes.

  • Men will emulate what is successful, and being effeminate isn't successful.

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