I know girls and their emotions can change very quickly and many times its not logical or even rational at all, and based on what I've learned it seems subconscious so they dont really understand why it happens either. Like they are programmed like this..
Basically, many dating coaches mention that girls (mainly before they fall in love because that changes a lot) can be very attracted to a guy and then suddenly lose that attraction quickly once it gets to easy or the mystery is gone.
So do guys basically have to be dishonest and pretend like we are less into you than we might be and act like we are unavailable? Make you chase us? To keep the attraction alive in the early stages. Even though it might already have been established that both the guy and the girl are into each other, the guy would only lose interest if the girl did something really crazy or strange, or if he found someone better on the side, but it seems most girls lose interest quickly once the chase is over and they know the guy likes them a lot (if it is early in the dating phase but sometimes even late into it)
It seems like this is something a guy must have these days, regardless of what other qualities he might bring (excluding high status or wealth etc those things can compensate for most things for many girls)
What are your opinions?
Most Helpful Guy
First of all, don't listen to dating coaches. There are a lot of competitive interactions where coaching is helpful. Relationships are not one of them.
The most important quality you can have when it comes to dating is self-confidence. I say this based on a lot of conversations with women as well as a lot of self-reflection. Women will be attracted to the guys they are attracted to, just as guys will do the same. There's no magic technique to overcome the barrier of a lack of physical attraction, but a lack of confidence in yourself can easily be a turn-off even if she was attracted to you from the start.
The problem is that a lot of guys don't understand what confidence actually means. It means being comfortable with yourself. It means that you don't need the validation of getting the girl you want in order to feel a sense of self-worth. So some guys see this as acting disinterested or unavailable when, in reality, it just means that the guy actually has things going on in his life. Women like when guys have things going on in their lives. It generally means that they're interesting and fun to be with. My dating life got significantly better when I had way too much going on in my life to have my happiness hinge on whether a girl said yes or no.
Sometimes a guy might be able to falsely project that air of confidence when in reality it isn't there. Other times, a girl may appreciate that a guy pays a lot of attention to her. Eventually, though, the fact that the guy does nothing but fawn over her stops being attractive and just becomes pathetic because his entire identity is the relationship. Would you rather date someone who brings his own personality to the table, or someone whose entire personality seems to be based on the fact that he is dating you?
I'm not going to argue that women are 100% rational and logical. Neither are men. In this case, though, they're probably being pretty darn logical.1