I like his personality but not how he looks. He likes me and has asked me out. I kinda 'friendzoned' him. He's my best friend now. Help, anyone?

He was in my grade in the school I moved out of last year. I live in the same area. So I see him around.

We were more of competitors than friends when I was there. We talked and debated about everything from world politics to love to fictional charaters. Yes, you could say we're nerds. But we didn't exchange phone numbers. Heck, we weren't even 'friends' on Facebook.

We stared exchanging very formal emails soon after I left the school, and soon we chatted for hours every day. It was the most fun I'd had in years. He seemed, I don't know, way too involved in "nerd" stuff to be interested in girls and stuff, so I asked if he had really never had a crush. And he said that he did, in fact, have a crush on me.

I kinda laughed it off and we kept talking about our 'friend-less-nesses', about trigonometry, about ourselves and our issues. And, now, after six months of being almost best friends, I realise how much he means to me. The warm feeing I get when we talk keeps me smiling throughout the day. It feels empty not talking to him. But I cannot imagine being in a relationship with him. Can I just be really honest here? He looks weird. He has acnal scars all over his face. And I don't know how I feel. It might just be that I like being friends.

I had a crush on a guy when I was eleven. Things never worked out. I got over him about three months ago. I was hard. I thought I'd go mad. But now I don't have a crush on anyone. Two of my three closest friends are guys. Aweosme. Fun. One of them is the guy I mentioned above. The other is someone I've known for three years now. He's short, witty, fun, cute, awesome and short. I kinda 'like' him. But I don't know either.

Do you think you can help me clear up my thoughts? <3 ^_^


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Most Helpful Guy

  • There's nothing wrong with the guy just being your best friend. You aren't attracted to him. You don't have to date him. However, you should probably explain this all to him and see how he feels. See if he keeps the friendship at the same level or if he suddenly changes once he finds out that you aren't going to view him in that way.

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    • I've made it pretty clear that I don't see him in that way. And we're still great friends. The problem is I get this (rather un-nice) thought going all like maybe I'd 'like' him if he looked better. Does that make any sense? It's like I like him, only just not. It's confusng...

    • Well, physical attraction is still important. I mean, you obviously think very highly of him in terms of personality, which is why he's your best friend. He's just not what you want looks-wise and you can't force attraction that isn't there. Nothing wrong with that. You don't have to feel guilty. You are young. Aim for who gets your motor running.

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