Sucks to say that this year has been pretty shitty for my romantic life. I'm fairly new at this whole dating thing and it sucks to feel like I'm doing it all wrong.
I feel like I've always been the outsider looking in, listening to my friends relationship "problems" and thinking to myself that it was all so stupid. I promised myself I would never be that girl, let alone that person.
I feel like all of the dates I've gone on ended with the guy thinking that he was going to get lucky that night. We talk/text for days/weeks and it all seems great but when we meet up to do something, it's as if none of the past matters, all they want is sex. I've made the mistake of doing that once, only to get really hurt when the guy stopped putting in the effort after the deed was said and done.
I'm in my early twenties, I'm not looking for forever. I'm simply looking for honesty and someone who is genuinely interested in me and what I have to offer.
My question is, how can I tell what a guy is looking to get out of seeing/talking to me? How can I tell if he's only being nice/responsive because he thinks he's going to get in my pants? Is it weird, to ask a guy straight out if he's just looking for a hook up and is he likely to lie about it if he is?
Lastly, what can I say or do to make guys see me differently? To not just see me as another notch on their bedpost?
Most Helpful Guy
Wow where are you? jk
But in all seriousness most guys approach women with the intention of having a sexual relationship, its almost biological, Man sees woman, Man like woman, man give baby lol!
But sometimes, men need affection, more than sex.
If you want to be viewed differently you need to look at yourself from a mans shoes, men will judge you 90%-100% on appearance at first, then he will think "i would have sex with her"
Now if you are dressed with short-shorts and a crop top, all the guy is gonna think about is sex
BUT if you are balancing on sexy/elegant he will romanticize about you
Now after appearance comes body language if you show you are crazy horny thats what you are gonna get back, show interest but dont show that you have the hots for him. keep him guessing
Finally, dont want to be a notch on the bedpost? don't sleep with him until he has invested in you, that way he has already spent a lot of time and energy developing the relationship and will not drop you after accomplishing his goal (every mans initial goal). this will make him want you for other reasons besides sex