I'm suddenly hearing about my boyfriend's secret friend?

SO!
I've been blessed with an awesome boyfriend but we are long distance. We haven't had any problems and been together for a while, over a year, and the only thing I could say is we had a 'break' that lasted for a couple of months. We have talked about marriage and kids, and the whole shebang. We've always been honest and never kept things from each other.
ANYWAYS, I was on my bf's Facebook wall because I was going to post something on it (and to look at his pics dont judge me lol). I came across something interesting. Some girl tagged him in a picture saying "thanks for the Christmas card!" Now I'm a girl, the way this girl was saying this was like she WANTED the whole world to know and LOTS of emoticons were involved. here's one itty bitty concern: I have no freakin clue who this chick is and my bf has never mentioned anything about her. I know he has friends that are girls, I KNOW who they are, but never heard of her. I texted him who was this girl and he sorta got defensive like "she's just a friend" and "I would never date her" and "you're my girlfriend". THEN I found out SHE was the one who sent him a Christmas card FIRST.
My bf hasn't sent anything to me.
He tried to justify that he was gonna surprise me with a gift for Christmas which is believable but at the same time doesn't make up for the fact why he never brought up this girl or a Christmas card. Like a simple "hey my friend sent me a Christmas card" would be sufficent enough. But me finding out like this?
Uh... weird.
My spidey senses are tingling now. Am I just overreacting and getting jealous or could something be seriously odd here?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Are you two 'facebook official'? In this relationship? Does your boyfriend know about all the guys around you?

    There is a possibility that this girl is chasing him, perhaps even after he rejected her. However as @Gooseman there said, there is also a possibility that he is playing you both.

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    • Yep. I tell my boyfriend everything, more than I probably should lol. And he knows about my guy friends, hell he's even talked to some of them and is cool with them.

      He tells me he told the girl he's in a relationship with me. Facebook official: yes. We write "I love you" and couple stuff on our statuses and walls all the time. Im just weirded out by this sudden post.

    • Well, then your boyfriend is not actually being defensive, he pointed out facts.
      1). She's just a friend. (She is in his friends list)
      2). You're his girlfriend (and all his Facebook friends can see that).
      He probably didn't even think to mention her to you because he rarely contacts this girl. Or have a notable connection to her. You are upset because of something this girl did which is beyond the control od your boyfriend.

      This girl probably posted that especially because she knows thst you two are having a long distance relationship. The title of your question implies a prerty strong sense of distrust. She is getting what she wants by shaking your trust to him. You need to tell your concern to your boyfriend, ask him why he never told you about this girl and try to listen objectiveky without being prejudiced. Trust is the foundation of a relationship for long distance relationships it is more brittle.

    • That being said, he did give you reason to doubt in some way. That must be cleared or your relationship will never be the same again.

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