Okcupid. What should I message a girl as my first message on there?

Online dating. What should someone put in the first message to the person?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Maybe you can open up with a question related to your shared interests?
    Like "Oh, I love traveling! Where's your favorite spot that you've traveled to?" It kinda shows that you actually have something in common and unawkwardly starts a conversation. And then you can just go from there :D

    Good luck!

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What Girls Said 3

  • My tried and true is to simply day "You have incredible eyes" or "you have an amazing smile.". These are innocent compliments that show interest but not in a creepy way. This approach has worked for me; 95% of the time I get responses and they have led to several first dates. Likewise, a guy who uses that complimentary approach to me is more likely to get a response from me. It is more original than the Hey my name is Joe how was your Saturday blah blah blah. My approach short and sweet
    Give it a shot. ;)

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  • Just say a simple hi. How it is going. Etc. Ask about her interests. It will give some kind of a subject that you can talk about,
    It will develop naturally.

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  • never done online dating but I would say Hello, my name is _____. how is your day going? maybe add a cheesy joke to grab her attention

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What Guys Said 5

  • I would say "don't look at the listed questions for a while, or else you'll see the very question that led to this message."

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  • There's a lot of girls that say "don't message me if all you've got is hey there, have something interesting to say." It's kind of annoying that girls can demand that even though they don't put that kind of effort in themselves, but anyway... I try to joke or comment on something in there profile so they know it's not a generic copy pasted response, it often ends up being a small paragraph not just one line. I get a few responses I'm not sure if I'd get more by just saying they have pretty eyes or something, that sounds silly to me, only weird guys would focus on how attractive a girl is (agreed?).

    I've had a girl's profile just to see how much attention they get and what things people say to them. They get a ton of just "hey there :)" or comments about their eyes or how pretty they are. Correct me of I'm wrong ladies but that stuff is boring, you'd rather someone try to have a real convo with you and not just turn up with "hi, you have pretty eyes," no?

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  • "Do you like Jell-O? It doesn't seem to be popular these days."

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  • Probably just stick with Hey, with a smiley face or extra y or something that makes it less bland. From what I hear, many girls won't respond if they don't find you attractive anyway, so I'd just keep it light at first until she responds

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  • Man I have fell flat when it has come to this girls read it but I don't get s response

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