Is it a good idea to tell him how I feel?

We've known each other for over 5 years now and we weren't ever in an official relationship. He wanted to be in a relationship with me in the beginning and I rejected him because I wasn't ready and had family stuff going on. He told me he was really hurt by it and even depressed. We beca, e friends again after about a year and would see each other once in a while. A year and a half ago he reached out to me and we started hanging out and hooking up randomly. I think I started to catch feelings for him again, especially after we slept together. after that summer, he moved away for work and told me before he moved he liked me and always has and sees a future with me. I saw him a few times since, he would try to kiss me especially when he's drunk, but I would turn him down. but i did give in the last time which was 4 months ago. i tried to avoid it because I do still have feelings but its hard because he leaves and i don't know how he feels or where we stand. I'm trying to get over it. I don't know how he feels about me now, whether he's being genuine. I feel like now he just wants to hook up with me period because of how I have treated him. he's different towards me now, not like how he used to be. and we don't really talk when he's gone. I think he's just done trying because I always turn him down, but I have been turning him down this time because it hurts too much to hookup then him leave and do it again. I do have feelings for him still. Now that he's back I just want to tell him all this so I can move on. Apparently he is dating some girl now (didnt hear it from him), but when we saw each other a day ago he was being all flirty with me like he always is. im seeing someone now as well. Is it a good idea to just tell him everything regardless? I think that way I will get some closure. But I don't know how he will take it


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What Guys Said 1

  • Tell him, it's always good to clarify things.

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What Girls Said 1

  • If you are happy with the guy you are seeing now, I wouldn't reach out to him. Just focus on the guy you are with now and just be open about what you want and don't do anything too soon. All you can do from the guy of five years is grow from the experience and use what you like and didn't like with the new guy you are seeing.

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    • But I still have feelings for him and I can't fully move on because it just me crazy not knowing or having closure with him. I feel that since we were never actually together I will always think what if and regret rejecting him..

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    • what did you do

    • I have been on three dates with a guy who lives 50 minutes away. The first two dates he drove down to me and we went out for dinner and drinks. For the third date, he took me to NYC to see the tree and ice skate at Rockefelle Center and had dinner. For the fourth date, I suggested drinks and he said yes. However, he cancelled a few hours before since he had a busy day and didn't feel like driving down here. He said he was sorry and was going to make it up to me. He is not a big texter and only texts to make plans a few days in advance. We met through mutual friends at a house party.

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