Did anyone else ever feel like this before having a girlfriend/boyfriend?

I'm eighteen, never had a girlfriend. And I have this bad feeling that when I do have a girlfriend, I'll just dump her after a week. Any girl I imagine myself in a relationship with, even if she's crazy hot, I picture myself breaking up with them very quickly.

I don't know if this is a defense mechanism, trying to break up with them before they break up with me. Might it be that I only want to be with a girl as an achievement. I hope its not that I just want to break their heart.

My question is, did any of you ever feel this way before getting in an actual relationship? I hope that I'm just feeling this way, and when I do get a girlfriend I'll completely change my mind. Please, help me, I don't want to be a shallow douchebag for the rest of my life!


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I felt this. I am now coming up to 7 months with my bf. I have almost broken up with him a few times but now I really like him.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Based on what you said: You haven't had to be committed yet, so the idea of being committed isn't familiar to you. Totally normal. When you meet someone that you want to be with, someone that you have feelings for, you won't want to let that person go. You just need to find someone thats worth keeping. 😊

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    • Hmm, so it's the fear of commitment aspect? I completely forgot about that, thanks for the insight.

  • I've felt like this a couple times! It is a worrisome feeling to be put in an unknown situation, but I'm assuring you, you'll be just fine!

    I was terrified with my first boyfriend, and it does take a little getting used to. You have to keep in mind though, you can't force yourself to love that person, nor can you force yourself to stay with them. What happens, happens. I'm rooting for you when you do get a girlfriend! I hope everything turns out well!

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    • It's a relief to know i'm not some heartless dickhead. Thanks.

  • I feel the same way as you do... in fact with pretty much any progressing relationship, like friendships or friends with benefits that I had, I always panic and ditch them after a few months even if things are seemingly going great.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Whatever you wrote, 100% fits my condition. I am sure that these feelings will fade away as you spend more time with them.

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