Why am I having such bad luck with women?

I know this question comes up a lot. But im just at a loss here. Im 24, almost 25.. just graduated college. And I've never had a serious girlfriend, just short term relationships with girls/women. And in those short term relationships I've either been played, they lost interest, or knows what. I've been so frustrated with the dating thing, I've kind ve avoided dating and finding women at all for the last year. Part of this was I was trying to get my grades up in school so I kindve shut everyone out for the last year. But now im done, im thinking about facing my frustration and fear again and diving back in. But the more and more these short term relationships fail, the more I assume the next one will fail.
Then there's the frustration of it seems like women only want men who dont want them or are already taken. I get a girlfriend and all of a sudden im a magnet for 5 other women. If your single, you ain't nothing. Then also women seem to fall out of attraction for me when I like them back (not being needy). Why in the hell do people dislike someone that they like finally liking them back?
Then there's the whole is she rejecting me or just playing hard to get? I mistake this all the time and assume rejection and back off. But in a weird way this is some peoples way of saying come closer.
Then, how to turn dating or "talking" into a relationship? How to bring up the conversation? And what do you say?
Lastly, I just feel like im being screwed all the time. Im a good guy, I really respect women, I try being cocky and funny and am charming to some women. But only for the short term. Then they stop talking to me and dissapear into thin air. I've been lied to pretty bad. But other times women I've been with think I was playing them. Which is simply not true cause I knew my feelings for them. I felt played by them. But, now im suspecting that there's a breakdown of communication or something. Why do people break it off when things are so great? Im just at a loss :(

Updates:
Its not looks I dont think... although I do need to need to get the gym to shed a few pounds and gain a few in muscle. Its whatever im doing and I dont know what it is. Or just bad luck. Im not a loner and I have had attractive girlfriends before. But, its just a lack a motivation to date let alone just meet girls. Why keep attempting something where you just end up getting screwed after putting so much effort into? Now this is another barrier I need to battle.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Ok the good news is Uve experienced bad relationships, how's that good u ask? Now u can look back and see where and what went wrong. I'm not telling u to change ur self but rather look back at the mistakes and learn to understand women

    This will help u in the future with approaching and dating, there's no real key secret formula to approach a girl and have her panties drop

    What there is, is experience.. Forcing ur self to try and fail.. Fail and Learn from.. And keep doing it till u start to get it right, every time u fail, U'll start to think "why did I say or do that" that's u learning ! Yup

    Approach as many as u feel comfortable.. I understand it's scary, why? Because it's new and fear of rejection.. But let me ask u this, are u alone now? Ok, now if u approached her and get rejected.. What have u lost? Nothing right? Back where u were But what have u gained? a bit of knowledge and immunity to the next rejection.

    Here's a tip, when u approach a girl. Don't get scared and nervous, how's that possible? Do u get scared and nervous when u approach a female friend? No right? Keep that attitude and give it a try.. U'll be surprised how well U'll play. Also strong eye contact is good but don't be a robot.. Blink once in awhile and break eye contact for a few seconds, too much is creepy

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    • Trouble is the past failures leave me here speculating what went wrong. I have no clue what happened or what keeps happening that things fail. Im not the type whos into random flings and thats what I get. But, I mean its not like I can hand out a Customer Satisfaction Survey everytime this happen and figure out how to better conduct "Buisness Practices". And anytime I do get to ask what went wrong. Its always very unclear or vague. Like the answer is almost always "I dont know". Or that their feelings changed. Or that I changed. Then I dont know if theyre being honest or lying and covering up the truth. And thats the worst cause when we like or love someone and they break it off, the truth is nice at least because it can provide closure and at least you can learn from those mistakes for the next time. But most of the time its not that cut and dry. Actually very unclear most of the time. And that the kicker. Good answer though.

What Girls Said 3

  • Maybe it's the type of women u are going for, we aren't all like that. Are u overlooking the nice relationship sort of girls and going for unstable crazy bitches?

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    • I do want the relationship type girl. Trouble is they are already in relationships or married. The ones I've gone for are bad apples that appear good at first. Ranging from people that dont want to really be in a relationship, to players, to people who are just plain psycho but seem normal at first.

    • I totally understand, it is very hard and u are right it can seem all the good ones are taken. All I can say is don't give up, there are still nice girls out there who are available, they are just harder to find

    • Thanks! I mean I fall, hold my head down, and completely give up at times. But knowing me, I get right back up and try again at least eventually. I want a nice girl in my life and I won't stop at nothing to get that. I have faith that not all women are mean or decieving. I always put a lot of effort into making a girl in my life happy and care a lot unlike many guys. All I want is just some appreciation back and recognition. Instead im usually taken for granted.

  • Did you put your foot in your mouth? Do you have manners? Did you pick the wrong girls to date?

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  • Will you consider finding girls who are like you, never been in real relationships before? So both of you are serious in it. Don't go for a girl who has dated for like 5 times, they can easily go and move on.

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    • I try. And its seems like most girls I know and meet have been with a lot of guys. But yes that's true you get hurt easily by someone who can just easily leave and move on like its nothing, when your the type of person who invests and cares about people.

What Guys Said 2

  • well you are better than some other guys

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  • You're probably not good looking. That's always the #1 reason.

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    • No I am actually am. Not a male model good looking but decent.

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