Mother hates me, girl loves me, what do I do?

I'm in a situation where the girl I'm talking to just broke up with me because her family convinced her to. Her mother hates me, and for no good reason. It'd been my goal to fix my relationship with her mother for the entire time I was aware her mother disliked me. Now, in order to fix the mistake of the breakup, I need to fix the misconceptions her mother has of me. I need help and have no idea what to do. I'd go the honest route, and probably will, but I'm afraid her mom just won't believe me. It really sucks because I really do love this girl and her family, but her family, namely her mother, just doesn't like me.

Updates:
Her mother simply doesn't like me. The girl I love insists her mom is just being protective, and for whatever reason does not trust me at all. I've done nothing to betray her trust. But I need to make her trust me to make this work. I don't know definitively what her issue with me is.

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Most Helpful Guy

What Girls Said 3

  • Can you honestly say you've never mis-treated her daughter? If you had a daughter, would you be happy for her to date you? If the answer is yes then the problem may just lie with the mother. To be fair you're under 18 so it could be that she thinks her daughter is too young to date anyone and so its not a personal thing with you. She my just be suspicious of any guy your age and what she presumes you want from her daughter. That's not your fault. The only thing that might change that is a serious amount of effort and patience on your part. Maybe talk to the girl and see if she can shed some more light. Fair play though, I think you are going about things the right way and being as respectful as possible.

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    • That's a beautiful scenario you provided, but honestly, yes I would love for someone like me to date my daughter. If I had one that is. That really does get you thinking.

    • Then she's lucky to have you and her mother should be thankful too. You just have to prove it now. That's difficult. If she's determined not to believe you, words won't make a difference, only your actions over time. Remain respectful, even if the mother is being unreasonable. If you're still on talking terms with the daughter maybe see if you can still see her even if just as friends for the time being. Give you a chance to prove yourself. Good luck with it, hope they both start appreciating you.

    • This advice is even better just saying! Sounds like you really love this chick... XD

  • Your situation is an absolutely dreadful one. Infact you undoubtedly love her if you are staying with her. I'd use that when approaching her parents. Love is stronger than hate, not to rip off the clichè movie industry as we have seen this with everything from Pixar to Disney to the horrible new shows on Cartoon Network... But love alone won't handle this, it seems you have had some miscommunications with her mother? Well if this is true (an it likely is ;) ) then you need to clear them up, but don't clear them up as if you've been rehearsing a half assed apology, think about the options you have as far as wording goes and find the least offensive to say "look you were wrong about me." Before even doing this you need to walk in and make sure you have a partner who's going to stand by you. I mean she left you for this to begin with... Perhaps question if she's really worth it. Sure she is if you're fighting for her. But hey you never know. Above all do NOT challenge her family. You need to lay it out on the table, and when in doubt apologize even if they were wrong about what they think you did. I hope that helped and it wasn't just a rant. And hey if it doesn't work out you could always look into this supportive commenter's profile ;) jkjkjk I hope it works out!!!

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  • Have you ever done anything wrong to your girlfriend? Do you act nice around her family?

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    • It's been my greatest goal to be a gentleman. It's how I was raised. It goes without saying that yes, we've fought a few times. But that happens in any relationship, and we've always moved past it. Aside from the few fights we have had, which I can count on one hand how many times we've fought, I try to be as nice as is humanly possible.

    • Then I really see nothing wrong with you.

    • This asker sounds totally sweet!!! He's probably this really good looking sweet heart who can rock a beanie, glasses, and even an awesome leather jacket! Am I right? Or am I right?

What Guys Said 2

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