Need some help understanding this girl?

I'm separated and 38 years old. She's 26 and single. we work together and for the past 8 months or so have had a pretty flirtatious relationship. But up until about 3 months ago it was only flirting. She broke up with her bf and I got separated. Things am got more serious since then. We've been sleeping together. Thing is, she seems not to want to commit, and is seeing other guys. Says she doesn't want to commit because I have kids and she says it will never work. But is obviously having fun with me in the meantime. I have a lot of feelings for her and she knows it. I know she is seeing this pretty new guy. Whatever... I guess my question is, is there something I can do to make her want something more than this casual thing we have going on? Cuz it's driving me crazy. The problem is, I'd rather have this than nothing at all.

I don't mean "make" her... I mean help influence her...


Most Helpful Girl

  • It is quite clear, dear, from where I m sitting that being she 'Broke up with her bf,' she doesn't want to settle down with just One guy nor get hooked at the hip in a heavy relationship. She is content to stay 'Single,' although plays doubles and triples in between the sheets with others, where you just so happen to fit into with her, and it doesn't have to be etched in stone that she isn't going to change her mind nor her plan anytime soon... you are just going to drive yourself more 'Crazy.'
    You know what she is all about, what she wants with you and all the others who are on her list. You have two choices and that is to hang in there and 'Have this than nothing at all' or walk away and find someone else will just be there to take your place and be another pretty face like you were.
    You can try and 'Influence' her all you want, but for now, she is enjoying the Good life with no strife.
    If you want more in store than you are getting with this free bird, then go out there and find someone who wants to be two birds of a feather and a mommy for your kids... she is a flirt in a skirt and then some...
    Good luck. xx

    • Thank you for your candid advice. I appreciate it greatly.

    • Oh, so welcome... honesty is my policy and you deserve happiness with a nice girl who wants want you want... thank you for allowing me to help here, dear.:)) xxoo

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What Girls Said 2

  • Really? It's obvious she dosent want you.. Just move on. You can't force someone to be with you if they don't want to...

    • Yeah. I get that. Except if she doesn't want it, why is she calling me and asking me to stay over and what not? We go out a few times a week, she doesn't want me to leave. Always wants me to stay. Why would all that be going on if she didn't want me? No need to be rude about it.

    • Ohhhhhhh that's cute... You're not even 18

  • You can't really make her, but it can happen over time if you're doing the right things sometimes. Not always, but sometimes it can.


What Guys Said 2

  • "I guess my question is, is there something I can do to make her want something more than this casual thing we have going on?", no.

  • no your in the wors place a man can put by a women the fiendzone
    no getting out of it bud just leev and cut find some one that like you for how u r.