Would you consider this a red flag?

so i started dating this guy and he told me i have to stop wearing makeup because it bothers him. now i dont mind not wearing makeup. i don't wear it that often. what i don't like is him just stating: "i want you to stop wearing makeup if you want this to work. makeup bothers me." if a guy asked me nicely if i could just stop wearing makeup, i would be fine with it. i'd consider it and talk to him. the way he said it was more of a command.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yep. Red flag. Dump his butt. He's a controlling personality. It starts with the make-up and goes on to be something else. If you stop wearing make-up because he said that's the only way you could work, he will feel victorious and then move onto something else to make you do. He's probably one of those guys who blames the woman for things that go wrong. Sometimes guys like this tend to be abusive. Put your foot down and tell him you don't deal with ultimatums in relationships. Don't let any man control you.

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    • *Sometimes guys like this tend to be PHYSICALLY abusive.*

      He's already showing signs of mental/emotional abuse.

What Guys Said 5

  • If a guy liked you he'd respect you for who you are and be happy with whatever you desire to wear or put on. Sure, there's gonna be the occasional "uuummm, I kinda don't like that," but the way he said it is disrespectful I would say.

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  • Who is this guy? You need to give us context to answer this question. Where did this happen? In what environment? If I said it, you wou;dn't give a rat's ass, but if your dad or husband said it, then that carries more weight. So, give us an update with the specifics of the situation.

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    • That said, I consider this a red flag no matter what. Anyone giving you "commands" needs to get bent. buy pepper spray or a taser.

    • it's just a guy i just started dating. i said that in the details

    • He needs to a go unless you like being on the receiving end of a beating. This is a red flag.

  • i say fuck that guy. do what you want. dont let a man hold you back from being you.

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  • I think he just wants to let you know and prove it that he would still find you attractive even without makeup. He wants you to feel beautiful to him without aesthetic masks and all that color and shit. I don't think it's a red flag. If he said it in a demanding way, that's just him probably being silly and serious at the same time. I do it a lot, saying things to sound like a command. It's cute. It's not to be taken literally or as a red flag in my opinion. :P

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  • live the life, before life leaves you

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What Girls Said 5

  • damn ! he sounds possesive... he is kinda insecure about the fact that other guys might see you more attractive if you wear makeup.. its YOUR BODY.. are you sure you really wanna be in a relationship where your so will always command you? and also did he command you on your dressing style?

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    • no it was just my makeup he hasn't said anything about my clothes but he said he hates women who wear makeup because he likes natural beauty

    • but still its a red flag!.. if a guy doesn't accept the fact that you like makeup (and prevents you from wearing it.. and imposing something upon you ) its just that he doesn't accept your choices

  • Definite red flag. He is showing a controlling trait that could lead to a bumpy road. The fact that he hangs over ya'lls relationship over your head like its a damn award that he even likes you, is pretty disgusting too. I would definitely stand up for myself if I were you and put him in his place. Simply say you enjoy wearing makeup on occasion, and you're not about to change that just because he has a problem with it. Seriously, even if he does "break up with you", good fucking riddance. What a total dumb ass. He should accept you for who you are and your occasional desire to wear makeup. I mean, who fucking doesn't?

    Don't settle for a controlling//possessive mind-freak. It will not end well. Men like that deserve to be alone, or a dumb broad that is too weak and indecisive for their own good.

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  • Tell him to suck a dick.

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  • Red Flag. He shouldn't "Command" you in anyways. and wtf is with the "If you want this to work" part, does HE want the relationship to work?

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  • I'm sorry but I absolutely HATE when guys say they don't like makeup, half the time if I dont wear makeup guys will say "you look sick" and then the next day "wow I hate when girls wear makeup". They say shit like that to sound like they're "nice guys" when really they're possessive as heck.

    A guy should not tell you things like that. I agree that if he said something like "wow you look so beautiful without makeup you don't need it" it would be okay, but flat out commanding you not to? Screw that.

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