I don't want to get into the exacts, but the point is I was sexually abused, my dad was long gone, my mother didn't believe me and kicked me out for accusing him, no one in my family believed me, it was found "unfounded" cuz there wasn't sufficient evidence. Everyone cut me out and shamed me and eventually I wound up homeless all because I came out with what happened. All of this has made a huge impact and now I just don't want anything to do with sex with men. It's really hard for me to wrap my head around. On good days I can fool around, but penetration is still out of the question. I want to know FROM MEN what the likelyhood of having a relationship with someone who's okay with waiting for sex. Not as in waiting a few weeks or a few months, but if you had to wait six month minimum and even then it's not promising you'd be able to, it's just more possible, would you be okay with waiting?
Most Helpful Girl
Reading some of these answers... just... ugh. Sex isn't everything, contrary to popular belief. There is more to a relationship than sex. There are guys who will wait, but it will be difficult to find them, just speaking from my own experience. I've had something similar happen (sexual abuse, being shunned by others for it, having a fear of sex) and people are so insensitive to it. They treat me like there is something wrong with me for wanting to wait, when I have a damn good reason for wanting to. People are constantly telling me how weird I am, how great sex is, how much I'm missing out, how I shouldn't be so "picky", how I should just get it over with, etc. My question is, why in the hell does everyone care so damn much if we are ready to have sex or not? It doesn't even affect them. We live in a society that is against "slut-shaming", yet shaming virgins and victims of rape is okay. Sorry, I had to rant. It ticks me off so much. Anyway, like I said, it will be harder to find a guy who will be patient with you, but there are some out there. Whatever you do, do not let anyone, a friend or a lover, pressure you into something you're not ready to do, because you're the one who has to suffer the psychological consequences, not them. You can try to seek counselling, it may help, but I really think people like us just need a person who loves us for who we are and not how we look in a G-string. If someone truly loves you, he will be willing to wait until you are comfortable and ready to do it. Best of luck to you.1