Are black women really that undesirable?

I'm African American, and i go to a predominately white college (black people are 9.5%) and it seems like all my friends ( mostly white girls) have no problem finding dates or boyfriends. We all go to frat parties together and they all can find guys chatting them up and no one ever approaches me. Is it race or?http://instagram.com/magsleigh1/


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The fact is that you go to school in a Southern town. Don't get freaked out... your friends are all wearing Alabama attire- that's how I know.

    So the problems you're facing may involve one or all of the following, in no particular order:

    1) Racism
    2) Taste
    3) Cultural differences
    4) Status

    Racism is the obvious one here. Taste; you said yourself there are practically no minorities at your school. Maybe most of those guys are just used to dating white girls. Culture; you're Black, they're White, there's a difference and you know it. I'm Hispanic and all three of us are different. Different taste in comedy, different taste in sports, different taste in music, how we conduct ourselves, etc. Status; maybe the folks at your school come from affluent families and you don't, or vice versa, this is kinda intertwined with culture.

    Don't be fooled into thinking that it's not racism or prejudice tho. The general public likes to think highly of themselves. The fact is that people are still racist as fuck. I live in Los Angeles, you'd think this place would be a social vanguard, right? Negative, I've been on the receiving end of racist remarks from- yup- white people.

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What Guys Said 17

  • Meh I like black women myself. In fact I don't particually care what skin colour you have, and if everyone stopped worrying about it we might get somewhere. Personally I think that Halle Berry is one of the sexiest ladies around, and to the best of my knowledge she is neither overweight or masculine.

    It's not so much skin colour that men find unattractive anyways, it tends to be facial features, it can be bodies, but there we go. Some people aren't even that superficial, and find people attractive based on personality alone, but in this media dominated world, it's becoming more rare unfortunately.

    Don't freak out about it, some people like it, some don't and some just don't care. There's someone for everyone in the end. :P

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  • I think you're very attractive and my school is mainly like that too... but it's different for me since I actually approach girls versus most girls wait to be approached. I don't think it's entirely a race thing, a lot of guys are really open to dating outside of their race but they don't know if girl are receptive to them. A lot of stereotypes would have you believe that black women only go for black men. So maybe you need to gain more confidence and approach the guys and show that you can be receptive to them.

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  • Black women are absolutely desirable. And here's the truth (which may be politically incorrect): A lot of white guys want to be with a black girl because she IS a black girl. Is that objectification at its worst? Probably is. But nonetheless it's true. I bet most guys if they were being honest would say they've had sexual fantasies about being with a black girl.

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  • Well, it's just a matter of taste. You are pretty and have a nice smile, so i honestly doubt that it has something to do with that. I'm more attracted to white girls, but i have white friends who also like black girls. In fact, i know a couple of white girls who only date black guys. I don't think there is any racism involved. If i were you i wouldn't worry too much about it. Hope this helps :)

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  • People won't give you a straightforward answer, but I will.

    blog.okcupid.com/.../
    blog.okcupid.com/.../

    It doesn't give me any pleasure to say, but discrimination does exist. People do value white beauty, and unfortunately, consider blacks to be undesirable. Not everyone, but it's undeniably a general trend as statistics speak for themselves. Even a handsome black man like Chris Brown was rejected by a white waitress who prefers "vanilla" to "chocolate".

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  • I hope so, that just means more black women for me. :-P

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  • There's more of a race barrier in certain areas of the USA, unfortunately. But trust me, you're a cutie, you'll find someone! :)

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  • They shouldn't be, but honestly from what I've seen, it seems like they are sort of less preferred. You go to a mostly white school, so I'd expect that the white guys would be more inclined to date within their race, not necessarily because you're not attractive, but because there's less of a cultural barrier there.

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  • nooooooo

    judging by your pic you look pretty

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  • I have never thought of that. Maybe my opinion is not that useful for you, anyway. I live in Greece, and having African people in school, universities is not that usual. But I think I wouldn't have a problem dating an African-American girl.. If she's cute, there is no race issue.. Just don't think about that, go out and flirt ;) :D

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  • BeyoncĂ© is hot

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  • Because most black women are hood and that is a big no no if you want a good relationship. That and the little bit of black woman that are dateable wants the perfect man and the last bit of good ones only want white men

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  • No, because once you go black, you won't go back!

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  • No, not undesirable at all. It's just there are a lot of hurdles to overcome. The biggest one is that most white guys assume black girls don't want anything to do with them--no joke, totally the truth.

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  • Not at all, I personaly only like black girsl I don't know why but i do, its just happens to be that area that ur at which seeme like that

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  • I ain't got no type, bad bitches is the only thing that I like.

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    • That song sucks!!😣

    • Lmao, I know right, but I love it for some reason.

  • Plenty of black guys love black women, talk to them.

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    • out of 9.5 %? not to mention the athletics is 6% of that

    • Show All
    • ... thats mean

    • It's not mean, it's the truth

What Girls Said 9

  • maybe you're kind of awkward or you behave in a way that makes you seem unapproachable. i was like that my freshman year of college so i didn't really get approached either. i think it's vibe more than race honestly.

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    • im a sophomore

    • ok well i knew plenty of awkward unapproachable sophomores too like one of my roommates. it's not unheard of. i still stand by it's more about vibe than race.

  • In all honestly, in my experience, if you're within what most guys find "attractive" then there shouldn't be a problem. From what I see, you're a gorgeous, tall, thicker woman who shouldn't have any problem attracting a man. The thing is, from what I've gathered online and through personal experience, most white guys will automatically count you off as not being into them because you're black and will therefore not even try. Also, most are probably into shorter, petitie girls.
    And just to be really honest, most people in America still value white beauty, so the closer you are to that, the more likely you are to be approached. I'm not saying all men are like this but a vast majority. Which is why darker, thicker, taller black girls tend to have a problem attracting or getting men. In my opinion, you're gorgeous, don't let others not seeing your beauty get you down.

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  • Tbh i think it is just because u said its mainly a white school so i would figure most white guys usually date in their race. And since you are the one that stands out its harder because if a guy did want to ask you out i think they would probably be seen differently by his friends or maybe intimidated. But also it could have to do with your personality.. Try to be flirty with them and see what comes out of it. But if it doesn't happen at that school then dont worry it will happen soon

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  • Race obviously. If I were you, I'd stop trying to date these freaks exclusively. Keep your options open.

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  • Well you know, you can always approach them...

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  • Not race just chubby

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  • It's just you... You need try harder than them.

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  • Yes it is... im black too I like white guys but seem like they still prejudiced about going out with us

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  • yeah it probably is race. Sorry

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