Dot points as it's easier :)
-We dated 6-7 weeks total
-After the first 3-4 weeks I was starting to realise he wasn't what I wanted in a partner (differing morals, beliefs and life plans which were incompatible) but we were having fun together and intense chemistry so I continued on.
-Around this time we spoke about our past relationships and he said he wasn't sure if he was ready for a serious relationship as he was still dealing with issues he has with his ex (LTR ended around a year prior and she'd just gotten engaged) He said he was worried he couldn't let me or anyone in emotionally as when he falls he falls hard and is terrified of getting hurt again. I thought this may be bs but he teared up and was really honest about a lot of things
- Because we were having a heap of fun together we decided to continue on, but more casually (still exclusively) and to just see where it goes
- It ended as I realised he wasn't what I wanted as far a partner goes and he knew he wasn't ready to let me or anyone in emotionally until he deals with his issues
Do you think because we have amazing sex and have so much fun just hanging out together and know that one of us wanting a relationship is off the table a friends with benefits situation would work? Although I don't want a relationship ATM (am changing jobs and degrees so won't have a lot of time) I'd still like it to be a non-exclusive arrangement so we are both not closing ourselves off to any possibilities. Would that be reasonable?
Any one been in a similar situation and if so how did it go? What obstacles did you face and were any rules implaced?
Most Helpful Girl
I think on your end this arrangement would work great, but I'd be worried about him. If he's not ready emotionally for a relationship (even though this would strictly just be sex) I don't know that it's even a good idea for him to begin a friends with benefits type relationship.
I don't know either of you so I'm not really one to offer advice on your situation but I feel like if he's not ready to let people in yet, he should just casually date and hold off on the sex until he finds someone he thinks he'd like to try a serious relationship with.
You can propose the idea though because for all I know maybe he does just want some action with no strings attached.1