How can I start trusting guys again?

I liked a guy I met at uni for about 8 months then went on 2 dates with him, which was in October, then found out he was playing me and all he wanted was sex. Even after he knew I knew, he still insisted that he liked me. He continually tried to contact me wanting to meet up, I ignored him most of the time. The last time I saw him was just before Christmas and he made it really clear that all he wanted was sex (which I rejected).

This is really frustrating! I've been trying to distract myself but it just doesn't seem to work. How can I move on and start trusting guys again?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Sooo... now you know that some men can play this way with your heart. To be fair, some women for what ever reason can be players too. You have to know that there are guys out there who are decent good people. I think that when it is all said and done, that most guys, after they get beyond that hormonal adolescent period in their lives, are looking for the same thing we are, someone they can connect with and share their lives with. I know, because I found one:) Hang in there, you will find one too.

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What Guys Said 6

  • First off. Did you have sex?

    Second off, that is all a lot of guys want. Most guys would rather ignore your heart and devote all their attention to your pants.

    True love takes time, effort, and sacrifice. Sacrifice what you think you want. Effort, because it takes labor to open your heart up to someone over time, and time, because it takes weeks, months, even years to get to fully know someone.

    If you surrender your body before you truly do know him, before he has committed his life, heart, and soul to you in marriage, then you are okaying you being with him, just for sex.

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    • We never actually had sex

    • Great!

      First off, learn to accept the painful idea that men will say, and do, and lie about anything to get into your pants.

      You have to really work at this game of life to win anything. Learn to trust your instincts, above ALL ELSE. They will tell you everything you need to know about the guy you are looking at, or is hitting on you. Your heart will tell you he is hot, your mind will agree. But only your gut will tell you the truth about him.

      Learn to look back when he was talking to you, and remember what you were feeling at the time. Was something in you telling you he was only interested in sex? That's your instincts. Listen to them, as I said, even above your heart.

      Your heart will one day agree with your instincts, and that is the man you should pursue.

  • Unless you want to grow old with a bunch of cats you're going to have to. Learn from your mistakes

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  • How many sucky people have you met in your life? How many good people? Have you ever stopped making friends because one time you met an awful person?
    There's good guys and bad guys, that's how the world works, and you're gonna meet many other bad guys too, but plenty of good ones too.
    Learn from your mistakes, and keep meeting men, never give up and never close up on men, because you don't wanna meet the perfect one and blow him off.

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  • I see no foul play here. Yes he finds u attractive and wants to have sex with u, how is that "wrong" on his part?

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    • Its more that he lied to me about several things, knowing I liked him, for sex

  • it's obvious

    first of all you should realise that not all guys are like him

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  • Trusting someone is a risk, and a rule of life is always take a risk but make sure you are prepared if the risk doesn't yield positive results. It's like saying before you jump into the water just know how deep it is so that you are prepared if things go wrong

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What Girls Said 1

  • I wouldn't go around trusting guys I would keep my guard up and get to know the man slowly before deciding to trust him. Evaluate his actions and judge his character. But a lot of guys are like that sadly so u don't wanna be too vulnerable

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