My scars keep me from feeling comfortable being intimate, would this chase you away?

I used to cut myself, I don't anymore but my arms are bruised from it.. During the day I cover the scars with makeup but often they still show.. I am in a much better place than I was in the past and just want to move on from about two years of cutting, but the scars are hunting me. I'm really afraid of being intimate with a guy and him noticing it.. They aren't deep but I have about 40 scars starting from my wrist to my inner elbow, would you get scared off if you saw them


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Most Helpful Guy

  • No. I'd probably kiss them. There part of your past, and it would make my heart hurt to know that you'd felt that way, and I'd hold you and want to make you never be that sad again. Probably that's dumb of me, because i know you can't fix people or MAKE them not be sad, but you know, there's no fool like a fool in love.

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What Guys Said 3

  • They wouldn't chase me away, but they would make me sad that someone I loved and cared about hurt herself. I would ask her where she stands now and tell her that if she ever felt the need to hurt herself, please talk to me first, or talk to a trusted mentor, because I love and care about her and want her to well.

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  • I would not. I was involved with a girl who routinely threatened suicide and it was emotionally devastating. I want nothing to do with anything even remotely close to that experience again.

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    • Self-harm is not an indication that someone will be emotionally abusive.

    • Self harm is an indicator of poorly managed depression, which is emotionally devastating to deal with.

  • Scars are hot, but I'm kind of a sadist. :)

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What Girls Said 3

  • I have scars all over my body, not from cutting but from working with a potentially dangerous animal (cows lol). I've run into so many barbed wire fences that now I have them scattered around my body and very, very noticeable. I feel proud of my scars, but I understand you feeling ashamed of them.

    Personally, if the guy love you enough and loved you for you, there shouldn't be any problems with a couple of scars. Believe me, forty is nothing compared to the number of scars I have lol. I've never really counted mine before...

    Lol. But really, if he loved you enough to have sex with you, then I don't think he would mind a few scars.

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  • I'm sure that if the guys worth it he won't be scared off by them. They're a part of you and he should be accepting. They're probably not that bad so don't worry about it

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  • Not me, no. I used to cut myself too,.. (well, 'used to' is a bit of a lie.)
    Any guy who will be scared off by your scars, especially considering you don't do it anymore, isn't worth it, honey.. he's the kind of fairweather guy who'll run away from /anything/, he's boring and unreliable and cowardly, in my opinion. You deserve better than that!
    And there's a practical solution, too - Bio-Oil. Or some other lotion like that, but that's the one my doctor suggested I use. :)
    Hope you stay safe & happy. <33

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    • self-harm is not just "anything". It's a sign of intense emotional and psychological problems.

    • Uhuh, yeah, is it, now.. Look, buddy, 'Intense psychological problems' are my forté, as with all my friends. I do not like my friends to be neurotypicals; I don't trust people who are not 'Mentally Ill', they are uncompassionate, in my experience. Saying that they'll run away from anything, is quite kind.

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