Most people seem to want cheap dates, and I don't mean that in terms of money or cost. They want someone that may be physically attractive, but beyond that, they tend to be these diluted, watered-down individuals that lack any real substance or longevity. Someone who is fun for a little while, but in the end, is easy to part ways with.
How is this fair for the people that live as best as they can each and every day? We're seen as boring, serious, weird, over-achievers, or some other odd variation of these, even if it's not actually true. Half of the traits I mentioned aren't even bad, rather, being serious or hardworking are quite obviously good things, but what I'm trying to say is that it feels like you have to dumb yourself down for most people in order for them to find you fun or interesting (at least in the immediate sense). People spin these traits off as being bad.
Then the ideals of marriage and finding a true love are seemingly endangered now. All people care about these days is having fun and I just have to wonder what dating short-term actually does for a person. How can there be any real benefit from it that will enhance who you are as a person, in any valuable way?
I've learned to be ok with being single, but when I'm going through life living every day the absolute best way that I can, being positive, working a good job, planning for the future, taking full responsibility for my actions and making calculated decisions and showing sensitivity for others' feelings... at the same time, it really kind of just sucks being left out in the cold, going through life unnoticed. It feels like girls don't seem to even want to notice you either because you're not the guys that's the #1 life-of-the-party in their little "party circle," who isn't even going to matter in a couple of year's time anyway. Wonderful priorities there.
Most Helpful Girl
I ask myself that same exact question. I am like the black sheep out of all my friends because I don't date just to say that i'm dating. I prefer to take my time and get to know someone who I know is worth my time and wants what I want. I'm still a virgin. Never been on a real date or anything and people act like it's a crime. I've learned to deal with it. I've learned to be happy while i'm single as well. People call me stuck up but I don't care. I know who I am. I am traditional in lots of ways. I like to be courted and treated with respect. I don't like to party, I don't like doing "normal" teen things and people think I am crazy. I think I am mature.
I understand your pain. I feel like I am not even noticed because I'm not in the spotlight, being loud, or doing dumb things. But, until I can find someone who compliments me, someone who can teach me new things, and help me understand in a new way... I will be single. I've learned to deal with it.
Good Luck to you though, you seem really cool and you have your head on straight!2