Should I Give Her Another Try?

I dated a girl for about a month. We got along great. We had a lot in common. We had 6 dates. The last two dates we made out. I indirectly pressured her to have sex.. I didn't mean to. It's a long story. A couple of days after that she sent me a text and said she wasn't ready for a relationship. She said she thought she was ready and thought I was an awesome guy.. but couldn't handle it. Later she opened up and said she was scared and didn't feel like she was on my level yet. She said she felt like she didn't know me well enough to like me as much as I seemed to like her. It was very sudden.

It's been two weeks since we spoke. I feel bad.. because I may have pressured her with making out 5th and 6th dates.. she went along with it and really enjoyed it. I asked of she wanted to have sex 5th date.. she said she wanted to wait. The 6th date things got hot in the heat of the moment and I asked again.. which I shouldn't have.. but it happens.. and she said she wanted to wait. I told her sorry and would wait as long as she needed and I was sorry. I have typically moved SLOW in the past.. but got friend zoned. So I guess pressured myself into moving a little faster with her. I was always a gentleman. Opened her car door, gave her my jacket when she was cold, and even offered to drive her home after feeling too nervous to drive after drinking with friends. She was definitely into me. She hasn't deleted me on social media. Is it worth contacting her sooner/later just to clear the air and offering to start over? Or should I leave it up to her?


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What Girls Said 1

  • Ok based on what you said I tried putting myself in her position. If it were me I think I would feel I like I was really into you and enjoying the make out sessions. But it can be intimidating to feel like you want to have sex with someone and have your head tell you otherwise. She was honest with you and told you she was scared. She might just need some space to cool down a bit. You could try and tell her that you really like her and respect that she wants to go slow. Just let her know that you got caught up in the moment but would never make her do anything she didn't want to do. She might just need some reassurance.

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    • It's hard to say what she is thinking. Because if she didn't like me.. she wouldn't have went out with multiple times. If she didn't like me.. she wouldn't have let me bring dinner to her place on our 4th date and a movie. She wouldn't have let me come back to her place on our 6th date to watch a movie. I was a gentleman. If she did feel intimidated or pressured.. I feel like I'm loosing my chance by not contacting her the past two weeks. At the same time.. i want to give her space.

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    • We had that talk... she had been with 8 guys and thought that was enough for a 26 year old woman. I really respected that and thought it was awesome. That's why I felt bad for asking a second time... it happens though. Part of me thinks she realized she didn't have mutual feelings. Hard to say.

    • Well I think 2 weeks is probably enough space. And you might be right, maybe the feelings aren't mutual. I would say ask her out again and see what she says. If she turns you down, its probably time to move on

What Guys Said 1

  • Leave it up to her, you've already pushed too far, and pushing more will only make it worse. If she doesn't get back in a week or two perhaps an invite to coffee would be in order, but take this one SLOW!

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