As a Christian, I have grown up to believe that men should be the one to pursue a woman. I have always agreed with this view but am a little unsure what to do in my situation. About a year ago a classmate showed interest in me but I didn't allow anything to happen because of my own insecurities and fears. I lost contact with him for a while but my feelings never went away. Since then I have allowed God to work in this part of my life and I believe he has given me the confidence I need to be in a relationship with the guy that I like. However, I know I may have caused him to become hesitant in pursuing me because of what happened last year, so I may need to be the one to make the first move. In this situation, do you think I should be the one to pursue or allow him to decide whether he wants to give me another chance and pursue me?
Should I be the one to pursue? Can I get a Christian's advice?
What Guys Said 7
I agree with what the other person said let him know you're interested.1
Honestly even as Christian, I believe we chose what to do of or own free will. Besides that I think you should start talking to him again a little bit at least, then who knows he might then decide to pursue you. If not than you might have to pursue him. Regardless, make the choice.0
Not a Christian anymore, but I haven't forgotten how to answer from that perspective. That said, there's no relevant Christian teaching on this matter, go ahead and ask him out. As the saying goes, "God helps those who help themselves."0
i don't see anything wrong with it0
Manipulate him into perusing you0
I agree with you that men should pursue women, but it doesn't hurt to tell him that you're interested.3
Here's what you do, ditch Christianity because we all know by now that it isn't grounded in any scientific evidence and laced with misogyny ( should concern you since you're a, ya know, woman) and go approach him, ask him out, and stop relying on subjective, archaic "values".0
What Girls Said 5
If you think you've made him hesitant then yes you should pursue him because it would be stupid on his part for him to try again. So honestly if you wanna be with this guy I think you're only option is to pursue him0
Hmm, I never knew that the man had to pursue the woman. I think it should be equal on who makes a move.1
I think you should ask him out. You can't wait on him forever. Some guys don't make the first move because they're that shy. You should go for it. You don't want him to be the one that got away.0
Hey :) I'm a Christian, too, and I grew up with this same idea... recently though I decided it wasn't actually something grounded in the Bible. It's more of a conservative cultural thing that tends to be found with Christianity, I think.
Technically, he started it last year, anyway, so it's more like you'd be picking it up where you cut it off than you just starting something out of the blue.
Either way, I think you should go for it. :)0
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