I need a male's perspective on this please?

One of my friends has been talking to this guy for a couple months now. She's already head over heels in love with him and it's understanding why. He's everything she's ever been looking for, and I'd know because we've known each other our entire lives.

The thing is, she's a very weak individual. He's done nothing to her to make her weak. She's always been that way. But, he told her that things were moving a little fast and he wanted some space.

She sent me the screen shots of their conversation and this was the last message that was sent to her. I am just looking for a male perspective to see if she still has a chance with him because I want things to work out for her.

He said, "All you are doing is pushing me away even further with messages telling me that you miss me and that you need me. I understand that you have feelings but you need to respect the fact that I need some space or before long I am just going to be gone for good. Trust me when I tell you that you really need to not pressure me the way you are with those messages."

Obviously, I could slap her but what's done is done. However, if she completely cuts off communication with him and doesn't send anything else until he's ready to talk, is there still hope for them? Because they have so much chemistry and they connect so well! I don't want to see her hurt.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, she just needs a bit of damage control right now. She is just totally freaking out and can't not text him. The more she texts the more he is turned off and won't reply, so she texts even more to be reassured he is still interested and this just makes it worse and worse. She needs to just say sorry and acknowledge she was just over her head and she will chill out.

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    • That's understandable and I completely agree with you. But, do you think because of what he told her that if she does in fact chill out that there's still hope for them?

    • Show All
    • Well the confusing part to everyone is that he told her he was interested. He stopped by her work just to give her a kiss and he came to her house the very next morning to do it all over again. That was the last time she saw him. He said his dad isn't doing well and he needs to be with him right now. So that's why he needs space. But he won't wven communicate with her at all. So the being with your family part isn't confusing but it's like he wrote her off right after telling her that he was interested.

    • Hmmm. Well maybe he did tell her that and she still over reached and over texted too much too quickly to raise some red flags with him.

What Guys Said 5

  • yeah there is still hope but she does need to give him some space
    I may have fucked up a relationship by not giving a girl enough space. so she should leave him alone for at least 2 weeks unless he contacts her

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  • That's a nice way of saying piss off and leave me alone. lol. Unless you're a sensitive little snowflake, messages don't actually push you away- you just ignore them. So it sounds like an excuse to bail while leaving the opportunity for sex later on when the heat dies down a bit.

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  • Rather than sending negative msgs like "i miss u", "I'm feeling lonely " etc ask ur frnd to send positive msgs like " i love u and i hope ur doing wel over there", "i may not b with u physically but I'll always b in ur heart. I love u" something like this.

    Wel the msgs depend on thr type of life and thr situation. Just make it positive

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  • Maybe she should ask him "Sorry, I might like you or something... didn't want to pressure you. What would work best for you? Should we not talk for a bit to cool down? Only chat a little in the evening?"

    If he has a clearer idea of what he means by "space" then you've got a better idea of what's going on.

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  • BB I N33D U

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What Girls Said 1

  • Sounds like he only wants her around when it's convenient for him. He wants her to keep hanging on so he can come back on his own terms and have her wanting him even more. He's thinking, if she'll follow my command and stay away when I want her to then she'll come running when I come back.
    It's just fishy to me that he's saying that her messages are pushing him away, that doesn't make sense. If he actually cared for her he wouldn't have that attitude about it. It sounds like he's using her…she's better off without this dude.

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