Do you wish that attraction was based solely on looks? Why not?

Alright, so I really do not like myself honestly. I have a lot of problems with self-confidence and self-esteem, and I know that girls just don't want to be with me or someone like me. I'm not blaming them by any means, it's just the way the world works. I always feel worse whenever someone says, "all you need is confidence!" or, "it's all about loving yourself!" and other stuff like that. Why? Because I feel like it's my fault that I am the way I am. I was wondering if other people wished that attraction was just based on looks, because while it's kinda shallow and doesn't allow people to go "out of their league", it wouldn't be my fault that someone doesn't like me. It wouldn't be personal, it'd just be genetics.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • No way. I would rather be able to change and achieve my goal than be stuck with my lot because it's just impossible.

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    • But what if you weren't able to change and people labeled you a loser because you couldn't? If it were simply looks, they wouldn't blame you, it wouldn't be your fault

    • Those people can screw themselves, and I wouldn't believe it's my fault if I had trouble with confidence and self-esteem, not like I asked for that, but despite that I'd still feel like it's possible to re-make my own reality. Because unlike our physical form, our minds and perception are so malleable. I mean I'm sure it's not easy, but I just think I would rather there be some hope than none.

    • Thanks.

What Girls Said 5

  • Attraction is based solely on looks. The personality comes into play if you'd actually go for that person. There are some guys I find very attractive that I would never go for because I don't like their personality but there are other guys that I find attractive enough to consider and their personalities make me want to be with them.

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  • No? The relationship would get boring after a month.

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  • No I wouldn't like it if attraction was based on physical, because I might not be able to date the person I was attracted to

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  • Nope because I'd be SOL if that were the case lol

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  • No because if you have absolutely no kind of personality or uniqueness then you won't be as fun to be around

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What Guys Said 1

  • sounds like a terrible alternate reality to live in. In that reality, its highly likely that you would change the source of your depression from "ugh, i have no confidence, so i can't get women" to "ugh im so ugly, so i can't get women". I doubt that you would just magically jump out of your depression simply because the main cause of your problem changes. At the end of the day, your main problem (acute singleness) remains the same, and you will not be happy

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