I think I may actually be attracted to the "bad girl" type. Is it viable for me to seek this sort of girl?

Speculating about the type of girl I feel I would like, I am thinking it's quite possible that I am attracted to the "bad girl" type, sort of the like the reverse of girls going for "bad boys".

I mean a dominant girl both in and out of the bed room who takes charge, swears a lot. People regard her as a bitch. Is adventurous, fearless, and thrilling. Very confident and takes no shit. Not very romantic at the basic level. Somewhat abusive and isn't afraid to yell at me and push me in the mud. Is physically and emotionally stronger than me (isn't afraid to start a fight with a guy). Teases me and messes around with me a lot. But still cares about me and is my girlfriend at the basic level, so almost somewhat like a love/hate relationship.

This girl would be quite different from me. Not that I am necessarily weak, but you know, I am kind of sensitive, romantic, etc. So I feel like due to the high amount of contrast, there would be a lot of spark in this sort of relationship.

Anyhow, is it viable for me to want a girl like this (basically, do girls like this exist)?

If so, what would my best bet be to encounter these sort of girls.

Updates:
Let me add: pushes me to my limits and out of my comfort zone.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • girls like that exist, but I wouldn't say they are that easy to find. Especially since you want bad but caring girl. There are bad girls and there are caring sensitive girls, those extremes are easier to find. But I think for you it's important that part that you should aim for - don't go for bad bad girl - she will break your heart. But make sure you go for bad girl that has a heart. And I don't see anything wrong for going for this kind of girl if you really know what you want. If you believe that is what will make you happy, then it's not like you have a choice. Heart wants what the heart wants.

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    • Exactly, that's what I meant. A bad girl with a heart. Kind of the girl you'll have a love/hate relationship with. I don't know - something about that dynamic intrigues me.

    • personally I'm glad to hear there is a guy wanting a girl like that. I am not as a girl you described, but I can relate to be very dominant and very caring, I'm kinda contradicted person. But I said to you that you make sure that is what you want since I know I scared a lot of guys

Most Helpful Guy

  • I kind of like submissive bad girls.

    Generally my observation would be that the girls you describe tend to go for guys who are at least as 'bad' as them'.

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What Girls Said 28

  • there's nothing wrong been attractive to a "bad girl". Did you know there's different types? there's the wild one, she parties drinks haves lots of sex with many men n maybe does drugs too, there's nothing stoping this girl. there's the dont fuck with me girl, lol she dont tolerate been disrespected by no one. She dont need nobody n dont care what people thinks about her, n lots of people look up to her. N then there's the dark one, she is really misterious, mostly gothic, u gotta watch out she dont put u into her spell. Haha jp. here's the last one, miss seduction, she lives to seduce men, she feeds off attention. Using men, for whatever she can get, but not necessarily a gold digger, i call her the heart eater.

    there's probably others like for example the cougar or the goldigger but not talking but them right now. All these girls are really flamboyant, are not shy, and not afrayd to loose you so is their way or the highway. Yes, they are a challenge n could be very sexy. Wich type are you attracted to?

    there's also a mixture of girls out there. there's really not that many good girls left. N if you find a good girl that has bad girl habits, thats a keeper. The one u can bring home to moma but will tear u apart. Now what i mean jelly bean? Lol good luck.

    Just for fun amma ill sharw with u, am a good girl with dont fuck with me habits.

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  • It's definitely ok to like that "type" of girl. Trying out girls with new personalities is a great idea and it helps you figure out things about yourself. The type of girl you're describing may come with some caveats though, so don't throw yourself wholeheartedly into a relationship with her, especially since it's your first time. Now, a girl like the one you're describing will have something about her which is pushing her to break the social norms. That could just be confidence, which is hard to find in a young woman and a really good trait to have. A woman who doesn't care what society thinks of her is possibly the "real" woman other people are posting about. She's a keeper. On the other hand, she could be an inconsiderate, immature or even destructive person to be around, and that's the root cause of her posturing. Her dominant personality is just a manipulative personality, and that's not cool.
    It's tricky, but you should be looking for a woman who gives you that dominant bedroom action, but who is not a destructive person in real life. As in all relationships with all kinds of people, remember to assess whether she is actually good for you and tread carefully.

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  • honestly a lot of guys like bad girls they just don't admit it on here. girls like that are everywhere, they aren't just in one specific spot. if that's what u like id say go after that type at least just to see if that's really what u like

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    • Yeah, they probably don't want to admit it because then their "nice guy" complaints will seem hypocritical, lol.

  • as soon as you're old enough go to a strip club, you'll find what you're looking for. Just be prepared and buckle up because you are in for a world of hurt

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    • Dont worry maybe I can save her

    • is that a joke? oh sweetie you are so young. I was the same way, went for bad boys to "save" with my love. I'll let you in on something that changed my life.
      1. people like that DO NOT love you. they love what you do for them and they love the way you make them feel, they do not love you any more than men "love" beer. as soon as it stopped getting them buzzed they would throw it away without a second thought.
      2. you DO NOT love them. you are in love with the idea that you and your love is so powerful it can change them. you do not love the actual person they are, if you did you wouldn't want to change a thing.

    • I'll nvr understand when people try and change one another

  • I feel like this is the kind of type that you'll grow out of liking eventually. At least partially, because it sounds like a pretty immature type of girl.
    But go for whoever you like, dude.

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    • Agreed. I think you might like that sort of wild behavior in the bedroom, but a hot and sensitive girl who has a great personality (and stimulates you mentally and physically) seems better than an insecure type of girl.

      The former can always be wild/naughty in the bedroom. In real life, a real woman is what you want.

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    • I already have an online crush on lumos @pshah2

      lol

    • I'm nothing like what you described though.

  • That sounds more like a boyfriend than a girlfriend... Hahaha
    So you're looking for a girl with a man's attitude?

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  • Yes, girls like this do exist.
    Regarding this: "I mean a dominant girl both in and out of the bed room who takes charge, swears a lot. People regard her as a bitch. Is adventurous, fearless, and thrilling. Very confident and takes no shit. Not very romantic at the basic level. Somewhat abusive and isn't afraid to yell at me and push me in the mud. Is physically and emotionally stronger than me"
    Causes me to be under the assumption you might desire to take on a subordinate position in your potential relationship. Are you seeking a dominatrix?

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    • Possibly. At least sexually, I fantasize about being both submissive and dominant, but leaning towards submissive.

    • The reason I asked about viability is because they say that most girls want the man to be dominant, etc.

    • A domme could fulfill those fantasies but you'd probably have to message them on some bdsm forum or dating website, etc.
      They could possibly be far. Also, you're correct that majority of girls are fairly sexually submissive which makes this a more difficult process but.. regardless, good luck! I hope you find her soon

  • You like girls like me haha we're fun. But we break hearts.. We aren't good at that emotional stuff so we tend to avoid that romantic shit. Be patient and you'll get the girl. Just don't be too weak, we like when someone can push back on our dominance.

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    • Haha, you sound like me! I turn Vulcan when it comes to romance.

  • How was your relationship with your mother? The partners we choose in life are sometimes similar or have the same issues?

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  • I am a bad grrrl serial dater that most men honestly can't handle.

    NOTE:
    We are definitely NOT for guys who hate attention and drama or want a "traditional good girl" that they can control.

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  • I think everyone has some kind of vision of the type of person they are into. If you like bad girls, then go for them, but you got to keep in mind that it might not be the same way as you imagine it.

    I suggest you go to places they usually frequent, most likely clubs.

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  • Go for it! If you've never had a bad chick then give it a try :) would you be looking for a serious relationship with one? Or just want meet some & go on dates/hook up?

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  • i fantasize about taking on that role with shacho. show him what a real badass is.

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  • And then she cheats on you and you cry... then you will be back on here

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    • lolol

      All this right now is theoretical talk. I can't score a date to save my life. Hell I can't even make a friend who is a girl. Girls only talk to me at a superficial level at school. Nothing more. I have asked out every girl that I have crushed on or been interested in historically, and have not once been accepted.

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    • you are just young and horny and you think a "bad girl" is better sexually but that is not necessarily true, she may have more variety experience but the crazy stuff I've done has only been in my longest relationship which was nine years, and while it doesn't take that long its that you become comfortable with each other and then you want to ask can i try this? as well love brings so much passion to sex it is really something else then you really get each other flowing. You do what you need to do but you remember me when you know what im talking about ;)

    • No I know what you're saying and it's not just that. There's something inherently undeniably attractive about a bad girl. As I said, the excitement and thrill factor.

  • Be careful. Make sure you are hot. If you're decent make sure you are interesting&fun to hang out with. If not, she will just play with you. If you're looking to just play around go for it fella ! Lol. But also don't believe just BC you feel you need the opposite it will be the best choice for you. Too much opposite leads to destruction.

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  • I like your atitude. The way you turn this bad girl into a goddess is almost epic.
    Yes, she does exist and it is viable. My tip is: Think like this fearless woman would think and you will find her. Take the charge once in a while and be adventurous!

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    • Are you saying that sarcastically lol?

      Your first sentence?

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    • lol I kind of want to be abused. I want to be made to cry as a result of physical and emotional pain inflicted by my girlfriend. I am getting hard thinking about it. lol

    • Between four walls i think everything is possible, but emotional abuse on a daily basis can damage you and it may have deeper consequences, that's what i mean by abuse.

  • Be ready to get hurt, or catch a green dick disease!!!

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  • Yes we do exist... Fuck the people who judge or think its weird... don't let basic bitches get in the way.. seek the thrill and you'll find it :D

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  • Why not all of that except for not being a bitch?

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  • Yup they exists. But we are hard to handle for most guys ;)

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    • Guys normally like to feel like they are in control and/or be dominant. I speak my mind and if you don't like it sorry its raining on your parade but I've got an umbrella. The other thing tho is there is a fine line between bad girl and abusive. I'm not mean but I am honest and can be blunt. Most people hate that.

  • Its ok that you like girls like me. Someone has gotta love us lol

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  • I guess there is nothing wrong with that.

    I personally like nice guys with a rebellious streak.

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  • Yes girls like this do exist you basically described me lol except I can be sorta romantic when I want to. Just approach them how you would with any normal girl. Usually when I find a guy attractive I'll just go straight up and talk to him on my own. I don't like waiting for guys to look over at me.

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  • Why not?

    I'm very far from a "bad girl." Like total opposite really lol But I've known some women who have a "bad girl" image. They like relationships too. You're not the only one who likes them, and if that's what you want, then go for it. However, you may or may not be bad enough for her. But don't think of it that way. Get to know her as a person.

    However, I don't think it's healthy to want someone to abuse you... I know I won't take any of that bullshit from anyone, and I'd advise you to speak to a counselor of some kind. Not only is it a problem if you literally want to be abused, but I find people who are enamored by the whole "tragic, chaotic love" tend to have tragic and chaotic relationships, which don't end well. Basically, please don't bring children into this miss. I have enough "bad girl" women in my family who had kids with very "bad boys" and the havoc wreaked upon their children even in just the early couple years does irreversible damage. And that's when I cross over from "live and let die" to "I'd really like to punch your dumb ass in the face, you don't deserve children." My aunt, the good girl who raised her child with a good husband, is not taking care of my little cousins, children of my worthless "bad girl" aunt and her worthless, disgusting boyfriend. She doesn't deserve any of her children. And she has many. Sorry, this took a turn for me. lol

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    • *into this mess

    • And my mom is the good girl who raised her children, not my aunt. typos!

    • And ew at all this "good girl, bad girl talk." Kind of annoying.

  • It's normal

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    • The first few scenes were hot. I got hard. The third scene though scared me. Of course, I wouldn't want her to actually injure me like that and cut off my fingers and stab me.

      But her general attitude and character. Yeah, totally love a strong woman. I see too many women these days that try to act so sensitive and cute. I mean that's fine and dandy, but a woman that isn't... a woman that is tough and strong... a woman that keeps me on my feet and my adrenaline flowing... is such a turn-on.

      I really think this is sort of the reverse of the "girls like bad boys" phenomenon for me.

      Even if it means potentially getting my heart torn to pieces, I really think I need to date such a girl at least once in my life.

    • yeah you can probably find those anywhere...

  • Everyone has their preferences. I hope you find your bad girl!

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  • Girls like that do exist, but whenever people describe it like that I think of someone that can cheat easily. I'd say I fit your description except I wouldn't call myself 'bad' - I don't take anyones shit thats for sure.

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What Guys Said 24

  • It is Viable, and when you start going out to bars/clubs/concerts, or whatever your shtick is, they tend to be the most noticeable because of their nature, and the scariest to approach. But if I know anything about you, you will make that your advantage.

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  • I used to think this way, until I actually found one of these girls and dated them for about a year. Trust me you don't want this, imagine the most annoying thing in the world, and there you go now you know what it's like

    These girls are fun in bed, but dating them? Not worth it. You probably won't listen to me, but you'll eventually see I'm right

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  • Not worth it dude trust me I've been through it. They are wild, careless, and things only work out on their agenda/time. The break up is the worst, it took me 2 years to fully get over it, because I was the innocent, never had a girlfriend, had loads of friends kind of guy. But looking back now, I was new to the dating game and didn't pay attention to how we were interacting. They are crazy, with a crazy past... If you can handle it go ahead, but in the long run it definitly isn't. It was thrilling though, not guna lie, but not stable.

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  • My only thing with my friends is that don't come complaining to me when she leaves you... my friend got a girl pregnant at 18... this girl had sex with two guys in the same day on a lot
    Of occasions... she made the other guy cry and break into tears... at her baby daddy's house... this girl is the biggest cunt I have ever met... she makes comments like "I get what I want"... she was an absolute
    Bitch to me... my point is don't come crying to me when the biggest hoe in you're high school class leaves you... you like what you like... just don't bitch about it to other people...

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  • Hey, if you're into those kind of women, go for it. Is it viable? I don't know. You are the only person who can answer that. Are you willing to put up with that kind of behavior? Will a woman like that respect you? Will a woman like that prioritize you?

    You seem to describe an bitchy, abusive older sister.

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    • ... who is also the kind of woman to be more in her masculine state than her feminine state.

  • Nothing wrong... it's just your type.

    i lke bad girls too!

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  • Add a slight inferiority complex about sex that leads you to believe you could never truly satisfy her in bed and you're well on your way to cuckoldry

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  • I love bad girls. I'm actually turned off by good girls.

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  • I definitely like a girl with personality and confidence. I'm not a fan of those who are going to play games, into criminal activities, or ridiculously reckless. It's ok to be a little reckless but I start drawing the line when it is potentially harming others.

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  • Sounds like a dude, or some cholla on steroids

    From the bad girls I've seen, that come close to your description of one

    They still seem to be dominated by their men

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  • Have all the "bad" girls you want, I have NO desire for them.

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  • Bad girls are soo much fun. But truth is they are all bad girls there are just varying degrees of making it known.

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  • Your looking for a country girl is what your looking for, ill admit i like a girl like that i was with that, just a warning dont piss a woman like that off theyll knock you on your ass in an instant lol trust i know from experience

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  • you will get hurt but there every where a bar, club, strip club good luck

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  • Im guessing bad girl is code for a whore. Plenty of those, just look in the comment section.

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  • No she is just easy pussy, but she will get you in trouble, because everything is you're fault.

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  • i want one too

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  • I also prefer bad, sexually aggressive and dominant girls ;)

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  • Yes, it is. Don't be a whiny bitch about it. Take it like a real man!

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  • If you are just looking for hookups, and short term relationships then a bad girl is a fine option. For a long term relationship, choosing a bad girl is normally a bad decision. Very few are going to be bad and sensitive enough to be your emotional partner when needed to fill that role. If you are wanting a long term relationship with a bad girl, then you are in for a lot of heartache.

    What kind of relationship you want, should effect the type of partner you are looking for. Typically men that just want sex will target the strong and independent woman and most bad girls also tend to be strong and independent. Men that want a relationship will target women that are better at compromising and working together. Bad girls don't fit this type of role as well.

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  • I know a girl who likes me that is like this, too bad she has 2 kids.

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  • I guess there is nothing wrong with that.

    I personally like nice guys with a rebellious streak.

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  • Not sure why you used the word viable but regardless, no.

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  • you'll just get burned. badly

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    • Can you explain?

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    • I think I meant "bad girl" personality more combined with romantic and sexual dominance. Also, a rough and tough girl, not one that whines much or cries after stubbing her toe or because someone was mean to her, and isn't afraid to physically fight. Takes things in life like a big strong girl. Not very sensitive or sugar-coating.

      I think that's more what I meant by "bad girl", not necessarily that she is a bad partner at the basic level.

    • Also, doesn't care about conforming to society or what people think of her. Confident in how she lives her life.

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