Will it be harder to find someone who likes me for me?

I plan on losing a lot more weight then getting super fit. I will look a lot more physically appealing. If I get more attention from girls the attention would all be superficial wouldn't it. Should I get a girlfriend before? How do I know what girls like me for me? I want to be fit for my health and confidence not to impress girls. If girls do pay more attention how will know the difference?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Will it be harder to find someone who likes me for me?
    Possibly. Do you find it harder to like a gal for her as in do you pursue gals you find attractive or do you pursue all gals no matter their looks?

    If I get more attention from girls the attention would all be superficial wouldn't it?
    No. I doubt you consider the attention you give to gals you find attractive is all superficial.

    Should I get a girlfriend before?
    If you want however I doubt you'd get a gf you're not attracted to which would seemingly make you a hypocrite.

    How do I know what girls like me for me? If girls do pay more attention how will know the difference?
    By determining if she actually knows you. If a gal is with you but doesn't know you most likely she doesn't like you for you,

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What Girls Said 1

  • As long as your white/black/hispanic you have good chances

    I f you are asian/indian than you have small chance to find a gf

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    • I was just wondering if a girl would show interest just because of looks. And try to get me to like he just because I'm more appealing now.

    • Looks matter to girls fyi

What Guys Said 2

  • I think that on some level we are all shallow. This is not, and should not, be considered a negative trait. We are hardwired to seek out prospective mates that would benefit offspring.

    The discovery channel outlook aside just do you man. Lose the weight and believe me you will notice who likes YOU and who likes your body. Listen to how people describe you. Are you "That guy with rock hard abs!" or "That really funny and sweet guy." You seem like a chill dude so I don't think you'll be having any issues when you're sporting a beach-bod.

    Good luck with the fitness quest man!

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  • Just because you get fit, doesn't mean the attention you will get is superficial. Losing weight and becoming super fit isn't a quick process either, it takes time and a lot of effort.
    Will some women give you superficial attention? Yeah sure, but if all they want to do is have sex with you and go out all the time with little to no meaningful conversations or getting to know each other... Then its a pretty good indicator that she doesn't care about the "real" you.
    Sounds like you are in the right mindset for losing the weight… and thats what you should focus on: bettering yourself and building your confidence. That's ultimately more important than worrying about when or how to choose a girlfriend. Do what's best for you, focus on your health and confidence, and a good lady will come along.

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    • I'm good with the weight loss. I have a diet program that worked for me. 30 lbs in 8 weeks. Then over summer I'm going to go crazy with the working out. I plan on building some muscle too. I'm just worried if a girl interested in me know how will I know if she's truly interested later. But I'm just looking for ways to see through any lies. Either way this fitness goal will be met.

    • Well, in that case, my friend… you need to decide what it is you DON'T want and listen for those "red flags" while you get to know the girl better.
      If she is interested in you now, the likelihood of her not being interested after you get fit is low, unless you are not good to her. Everyone is attracted to healthy people, that is something that is just ingrained in us all.
      To look into someone and see if they are worth your time takes getting to know them and knowing yourself. I wish I could give you specific things to look for, but what I find acceptable likely isn't what you find acceptable. Be sure to listen to what they are saying, and listen closely. Look for general honesty, that is a good place to start. If they are always changing their stories about how something happened or it seems like they are always tailoring something to impress you instead of just saying what happened, its a good indicator they aren't honest.

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