Guys what would you think if your girl said "i love you" first?

Would you be weirded out or should the girl be the first to say it?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Tough question.

    You have to find that moment of perfect synchronicity to pull it off. That moment of elucidation when you both become self-aware of your feelings.

    This is a hard fish to catch. You have to set the hook at just the right time.

    It would be better to say it too late then too early.

    Just look at every chick flic ever made. The moment of 'elucidation' and self-awareness always comes when they stand on the precipice of relationship oblivion.

    And there's really only one way to do it. You have to run away and see if he let's you. If he would let you get away without a protest, then that isn't a match. But if he does search for you, then you're close to that magic moment. And if he loves you enough, it might just be the forever moment.

    Everything in a chick flic is fake except for the moment of elucidation. That part they get right.

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What Guys Said 26

  • Nope. My definition of love seems to be different. Even my therapist disagrees. If you truly love someone you can never not love that person. You might love them differently at some point, but you can never come up with the words "I don't love you" or "I have fallen out of love with you". If you can say "I don't love you" then you never loved that person.
    But having known true love I know when it is love. I met someone just over a month ago. We just spent the weekend together. I know I love her. Just like I knew with my first wife. I loved her inside of two weeks and that lasted 25 years. It was her that wanted the divorce, not me.
    But I am being very careful. I told my sister after our 2nd date that if she doesn't dump me, I am going to marry her some day. So I already know that I will not say "I love you" until she does. I don't want to scare her off. Well I guess if she gets stubborn that at some point I will break or it will come out by accident. I have almost said it already.
    But since women get scared off so easily and are so afraid of commitment, I plan on waiting until she says it first.

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  • If I felt the same way I'd be really, really super happy and touched by it. I don't think there are any "shoulds" when it comes to that kind of thing though. Just follow your heart.

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  • I wouldn't think anything negative that's fosho.

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  • Well my GF told me she loved me first:

    At first I might of when I was drunk, but I quickly told her I didn't mean it (even though I did, but I just didn't think it was the right time).

    We went to the movies once (3 months into the relationship) and she quietly said "I love you". She looked at me and quite obviously looked really embarrassed and red... I just went "I love you too".

    It was the most perfect moment ever.

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  • she did and she had to pressure me to say it back because i wasn't comfortable saying it before i had sex with her

    i meant it and i still don't say it often cause i know how she gets... i say one nice thing and she'll never let me live it down hahaha

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  • I'd be like Yay! I love you too!!!

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    • Or you could do what my friends boyfriend said 'yay, I love me too.

    • Well that's a bit self centered. And honestly, I don't think I love myself. Like, I'm a nice guy and all but it's more of a slight fondness. Not love

  • I would not have a problem with that... I would explain to her though where I am at... especially if I am not ready to say it yet!

    Or... I would say it and tell her that I had been waiting to say it and did not want to freak her out.

    I am a firm believer in truly getting past the lust point and knowing that it is real.

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  • That depend on when she said it, and wether or not i felt the same way. I think at the point of dating for two months, he wouldn't still be with you i he didn't love you.

    I've never been the first to say it, but I've said it immediately without hesitation and felt it too, whenever she has said it. I just don't like the feat of saying it first, so no matter how much i love her, i would rather wait until she says it.

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    • I don't think you can really know if you're in love with someone after only two months... that's about when you'll start to figure out whether this is someone you can see yourself loving, but you don't really know them that well yet...

    • Well yes that is true. The way i see it is that after about two months is the point where you START to realize that you love the person. And since you know that you have a chance at falling in love with them, you stay in the relationship. Some people say it at this point when they really shouldn't because they are starting to fall in love with someone but it is still infatuation. But if you two were meant to be a anyway, you may as well say it and hope that they are at the same stage in the relationship. Besides, its different for everyone, some people fall in love faster than others. I wear my heart on my sleeve so i fall in love pretty quickly. @Sara413

    • I disagree where you say "you may as well say it"... I think it's better to wait a little longer until you're more sure, rather than risk putting pressure on the relationship when it's only just beginning.

  • If the feeling was mutual I would be like.
    giphy.com/.../hugh-jackman-amazed-awe-yidUzHnBk32Um9aMMw

    <3

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  • Depends. If a girl told me "I love you" first and I felt the same way I'd tell her I loved her too. If her feelings where farther ahead then mine I'd tell her that I like her and enjoy spending time with her but wouldn't tell her that I love her. I don't believe that "I love you" is something to be said lightly.

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  • i would buy her some heart shaped chicken nuggets then

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  • do you really love him? if it was real love it wouldn't just be some thing you wait to say out of social convention. if you feel real love it is genuine and there is no uncertainty. you shouldn't have to even ask this question if it is real love. you just know. it isn't real love. you will or have already had sex with him and dirtied yourself and then he has or will have ejaculated in or on you a few times and then you will break up and move on to the next guy and play out the same "love" act. it is all BS wake up.

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  • I would think/say this "No you don't, you just think that you do" and that would be the end of it ^^

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  • This has happens to me before. And when she asked if I loved her back, I respected her enough to be honest. I responded "no, not yet" we broke up after that, but to this day I don't regret being honest with her.

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  • I don't like people saying that to me and I don't like saying it, so I would be weirded out but not because she did it first

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  • If she says within first 5 dates, then that's not good. After that, she is most welcome :).

    but, it is always better show love with actions rather than words.

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    • Their are also indirect ways to say the same thing, like by cooking his favorite meal, by showing genuine interest in his hobbies etc.

  • If she really meant it and I felt the same way; it would really get me right in the heart. I just hope she holds true to what she says and doesn't make a complete u turn

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  • i would kiss that girl under the moonlight on a bridge over a river glistening in the moonlight

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  • I'd like it if I loved her. If I didn't it wouldn't be too good, and I'd likely break up with her soon if I felt we were on really different levels

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  • My ex said it first, and it made me feel relieved. I wanted to say it but I didn't want to come off as weird or fast

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  • don't really matter

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  • I'd be flattered

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  • I hope she wouldn't say it unless she knows I love her, otherwise that is very awkward.

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  • No problem because she said what she felt. I'd love her like she's one and only

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  • welll - depends on where it was said. In bed? I'd probably not take it too seriously lol

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  • Like 80% of the time girls are the first to say "I love you."

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What Girls Said 3

  • It'd depend on whether or not he feels the same way. Honestly, if you're not confident that he feels the same way just yet, I'd hold off on saying it, because in that case it could scare him off. But if you believe that he loves you too, go ahead and say it first!

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  • Honestly I don't think 90% of guys want to hear that

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  • Haha funny. I actually told my bf last weekend that I loved him first. He smiled n said it back. I was nervous because he is somewhat shy about this stuff and I didn't know if he felt the same way. I said it before we went to bed. I texted him later when we I went home n talked about it. He said he has wanted to say it for a long time n has almost said it but was nervous. I was nervous but I couldn't not say it any longer. I'm very glad I did :)

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