Why are female nerds more socially accepted then male nerds?

It seriously seems like female nerds are turned down less then male nerds when it comes to nerds and it bugs me as to why


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Society...
    Social acceptance = (Anything) + Boobs/Booty

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What Girls Said 13

  • female nerds still care about being clean and attractive to the opposite sex. They may dress up in costumes like anime, comic book, and video game characters but they still are feminine and desirable by the opposite sex. You can't tell me that this nerdy woman right here is not at least physically attractive.
    xaxor.com/.../Jessica-Nigri-hot-pics-mix14.jpg
    with guys, if they are interested in physical attractiveness and sex then it doesn't matter at all what the girls personality is and that she is a nerd.

    nerdy guys on the other hand are like this
    img2.wikia.nocookie.net/.../Geek-gamer-pc.jpg
    with bad hygiene and terrible social skills. a lot of them are bitter towards women too but yet they are afraid to learn how to talk to a woman so instead they stay away from them and just fantasize about them and well, it is extremely hard for anyone other than another nerdy man to work with that.

    lol I am just generalizing. I dont really believe what you posted but you asked a generalized question so you will only get a generalized answer.

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    • Posting pictures of a booth babe does not solidify your point any as most girls at cons look nothing like that.

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    • I don't know wikipedia says she started as a cosplayer. If I could get paid for my hobbies I'd be thrilled too!

    • she's been asked questions about characters she cosplays and she acts confused or stupid. Also dont believe everything you read on wiki

  • I don't know I think all genders of nerds struggle at some point. Though I think it's better than it used to be. Anime was basically a bad word in middle school and now it's mainstream. People would have neeever admitted to liking a show like dr who in high school except the weird drama or English nerd.

    But I also think women tend to make communities around the things they like by doing things like writing fan fics and cosplaying. Obviously guys do these things too but it usually seems to be women who got the ball rolling in my fandoms. Since we have people to talk with and share out ideas with we don't feel as isolated and there's not as much gatekeeping. I think it helps people be more positive when they feel accepted.

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    • Well a lot of guys won't cosplay because a lot of female cosplayers tend to label just about every guy at a con a creeper until proven other wise making it hard to associate with people in a female dominated hobby

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    • Had more pictures taken then anything they're floating somewhere around the web

    • Ahhh! That's so cool!!!

  • Thats not true at all.

    "Nerd (adjective: nerdy) is a descriptive term, often used pejoratively, indicating that a person is overly intellectual, obsessive, or socially impaired"

    Overly intellectual, obsessive, or socially impaired girls are just as ostracized. Trust me. I was that girl for the first 15 years of my life and I was bullied, isolated etc. The bullying only stopped after I moved away and reinvented myself.

    That being said, you could be talking about the whole "gamer nerd" fad. This isn't anymore socially accepted for girls than it it for guys... unless the girl is using it as a way to be interesting and part of a trend. I knew a lot of girls who would walk around saying how much of a geek/nerd they were, say that starwars was their lifeline and startrek feeds their soul, but they couldnt answer a simple question about either one of those productions.

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    • Then explain how you see more female nerds who are not single compared to male nerds. I also know for a fact a lot of female nerds dont even date male nerds, been to way to many conventions where girls are asked where their boyfriends are and they give a response like "oh he's not into anime or gaming"

  • male nerds tend to only want hot girls that are out of their league. female nerds will either usually date a fellow nerd, or a non-nerd who isn't that good looking.

    female nerds do not have it easy though. most non-nerdy males do not like them and might go out with them if they can't get the girl they really want, but a lot of those girls get their feelings hurt when he drops her for a non-nerdy, often cooler or better looking girl

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  • Let me put this in the form of a metaphor. The grass looks greener on the other side when it's actually the same shade on both sides of the fence.
    Nerd girls get put down more than you think. We hear a lot of"That's not for girls" type crap A LOT. We basically just get put down in a DIFFERENT way.

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    • Define getting put down in a different way, because I have had women straight up stop talking to me at the mention of video games

    • Simple, if they did that they're faux nerds or hypocrites. Either way they did you a favor. I wouldn't dump a guy for playing videogames.

  • Where I am from, people make fun of me because I like anime and bla bla. I don't think is more socially acepted. It's a matter of taste and it depends on the type of girls you have been approaching so far.

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  • Well I believe its hard to find a girl nerd I guess. I don't know. Some men think female nerds are rare and they want to try out how it is to date a female nerd I guess. I don't know. Never been in a relationship before.

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  • Because usually we look pretty cute doing it and for boys who play Xbox etc find that there are more common interests and they connect with them and they find it hot there into gaming.

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  • I love male nerds lol. what do you mean by nerds? Annoyingand smart ones or the unattractive and weird ones?

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  • Female nerd here. And it is worse for us

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  • because some guys think that nerdy girls are sexy

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  • Female nerds tend to have better social skills. Also female nerds have better luck with guys because they tend to stay within their league (or other nerdy guys), while nerdy guys fawn after girls who are out of their league or girls they have nothing in common with so they end up facing more rejection.

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    • I dont play outside my league I actually avoid girls that clearly have no shared interests

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    • And it's not that we dont have social skills its just that most of us are shy

    • I didn't say you don't have social skills. I said women tend to have better social skills than men.

  • Because female nerds have coochies, whereas male nerds don't.

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What Guys Said 15

  • Do you mean for turned down for dating? or social acceptance in general?

    I think some nerds defining as similar to geeks in many ways - a lot of male nerds, but not all by any means, wouldn't accept a female nerd in certain aspects. I suppose to a degree, there is still a kind of "trash talk" addition to the culture that psychologically keeps some guys from going for girls in that culture.

    I myself am hopefully cautious if I hear of a girl who's into nerd or geek culture - I'm open about it. If a girl makes some claim but follows up and actually seems to know the thing they like, then I love it. But I won't like it if you make claims then can't back them up - no matter who you are.

    I suppose it depends on how you mean "socially accepted." I've been to "geek" events, and I was stunned because I don't live in a big geek culture. Some of the kindest, most genuine people I've met (though there are geeks who are bullies, too). If you can "prove" geek credit pretty quickly (sometimes it's simple, like just going to a geek event), then most of us will be friendly. We tend to accept each other. I was stunned by how well people treat other nerds. Perhaps it's because most of us went through really tough times and weren't accepted, so most of us accept others because we know it stinks to be a social pariah.

    I'd say overall, I'm not that popular (though I'd think I'm easily likable), though I suppose that's not JUST because of being a geek, but an artist as well. If you don't make a LOT of money in my area, or you aren't famous, then art is just "weird" - though geeks are making headway. It's probably the best time so far to be a geek in a culture that isn't particularly geeky.

    My family doesn't "get" it but my mom loves me - she just glazes over when I talk. I suppose there'd be more social acceptance if I made better money or were more famous.

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    • Money makes anything socially acceptable sadly

  • Maybe it's because a lot of the time the accepted female nerds are real just girls that think they look dorky in glasses. But an actual female nerd probably has it rougher especially since nerd things tend to be more for guys like computers (not saying women can't use one or can't understand one).

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  • I think nerds are actually accepted mostly among their own peers. Male nerds are seen as "socially inept" while female nerds are seen as "cool" for not being like "all the other girls who only love boots and makeup".

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  • So, this is what western society has been reduced to; quibbling about which nerd sex has it worse.

    I don't suppose it would help any to state that there is no such thing as a nerd and that it is a socially contrived pejorative without any meaningful definition.

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  • Its a cultural thing I believe. Seems like Asian culture promote a much more positive view of those personality types. Western culture is much more into machoism. I personally blame women because men try to fit into the personality mold that they feel will be most appealing to women. And for all the ladies that say you are attracted to the so called nerd types. There are 4 or 5 more who aren't.

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    • Because intelligence is valued more so then physical attributes over there

  • I think it's because women are recognized for being a particular "type" since men see them as people to date. A nerdy male falls under the category of being less masculine and therefore receives less respect.

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  • They still have a vagina. Sorry bro. You can't compare.

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  • because smart females are a rarity so exotic and so have an appeal
    like a gem among stones...(JK)

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  • They're girls. They don't have to be strong or self confident to be attractive. Males do.

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    • Strength is not always a physical attribute though

  • Most nerds don't have a lot of confidence. Men need confidence, women generally not as much.

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  • I am not sure what you mean by nerd, the definition varies from person to person.

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  • Nerd or not, they still have something many men want. Pussy and boobs.

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  • Because if a girl is hot/has a nice body she'll be attractive to guys regardless of her personal interests, be they "nerdy" or otherwise. Same is not true for a guy, since girls place more weight on social skills, and an interesting personality than guys tend to when considering girls.

    Secondly, supply and demand. There are more nerdy guys than girls, so the girls have more options in the nerd community in addition to the hot ones having options outside the nerd community. If you're a guy and a successful nerd (i. e., you have a great job or great prospects) then you'll have good options too.

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  • Probably because guy nerds are ugly

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