Will you date someone that has trust issues? Or has a hard time believing you?

I see him always staring at me like he his thinking about something, but it seems like he doesn't believe me when I tell him I like him and how safe I feel around him and comfortable. He tells me how he wants me in his life but he doesn't believe me? He waits and lingers staring and smiling like he is waiting for me to kiss him. But I chickened out because I was afraid. But maybe this is the reason?
He has been heartbroken as well after coming back from the air force the girl he was dating was married to another guy and he had to find out by some one else.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I honestly think you should give the guy the time that he needs in order to be in a trusting romantic relationship again. He's probably moved on, but the fear of that happening again is really scary to him. Don't leave him or ignore him as doing this would result in pointless situations, instead try being there for him. The fear of this happening to him again is not your fault, and neither is it his so don't make his trusting problem personal to you.

    Just give him time and be patient, throughout time he will realize that you're no harm, although the thoughts may still harm him.

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    • I am most definitely, I am always there for him. I would never ignore or give up and he has said I can find someone better than him, and it seemed like he didn't really mean it and I disagreed with him, if it doesn't work out, I will understand and I'm still going to be there for him. And thank you and I understand what you are saying and I will be patient for sure.

What Guys Said 5

  • Yes i could date someone with trust issues
    we could help build trust with each other.

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  • Trust issues are difficult, because then peace would be harder to come by. You're just going to have to overcome your trust issues, keep them locked up tight. Your guy friend doesn't sound bad.

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  • I'd date them but the umming and ahhing would start to get old after a while.

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  • I would like to think I'd be able to remedy that by showing them how it is to be with someone they can trust. I think people can learn to trust again when surrounded by the right people.

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    • So if stay by his side and show I am willing to be patient and let him figure it out himself, maybe he can trust me enough, his friends always hint around and edges him on but he will just blush and smile.

    • Show All
    • Yes I really care about him.. And if it will never happen I will still continue being there for him as a friend still... And yes ( this happened way before we met) during high school he was dating this girl ever since freshman year and after graduation he decided to go to the air force, 4 years later the girl he was with was was married to another guy and he had to find out by someone else. He will be leaving again so I understand if he has trust issues with long distance

    • Hmm I've been in a long distance relationship before so I know it's definitely not easy. If you care about him stick with it and in due time I'm sure you'll gain his trust. On the flip side, if it gets unhealthy and he is being unreasonable in what he's asking from you to gain that trust then you may have to consider just a friendship. You both have to work together and compromise.

  • I can give some time and wait a bit longer than normal.. so yes

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    • Same here and thanks and if he doesn't trust me enough that is fine, I'm just still glad he is happy having someone like me in his life even as friends.

What Girls Said 6

  • I'm not sure what I'd do. He sounds damaged, and if you think you'd be good together then that's one thing and you could give it a shot, but if he's always doubting you then maybe he isn't ready for a relationship himself.

    I feel like people who have been burned in the past should hit refresh with every new person they meet. Just because somebody hurt you or cheated doesn't mean someone else will.. Comparing new relationships to old ones is pointless because it's a new person, a completely new possibility... That's just what I think.

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    • I completely agree with you and the only reason I'm not giving up because I know how he feels and it happened to me and it was hard for me to start a fresh relationship with someone else. But I knew he was the one because compared to other guys I was uncomfortable around them and I felt pressured. He knows because I told him, maybe one day he will realize he can give it another try since we are friends anyway it could be nice

  • No. Starting a relationship with no trust in it is a disaster waiting to happen. This guy sounds like he needs to heal or get over what happened before he dates again.

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    • I understand and thank you, nothing wrong waiting and since we are friends already maybe it might help

    • Sometimes it's social anxiety, one of the most common social disorders, in which case you can't just heal.

    • Thank you I understand now, I will just be there for him as a friend.

  • Nope I won't date a person whom I don't trust or who doesn't trust me because I believe that trust is one of the main thing that binds the couple into a beautiful relationship..
    In your case I think that he was deeply hurt by his past relationship.. So you should give him some time to bury his past and to believe you..
    You should try and talk to him and make him believe that you won't hurt him.. express your interest and love for him and I believe that it would work..
    All the best..:)

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  • stay away from insecure guys, its cute in the beginning , but gets annoying
    there are to many guys out there with no trust issues , don, t settle !!!

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    • Thanks and I doubt it will happen, as long as he is happy having me in his life as a friend, and he tells me it all the time I am happy as well, and plus if he do he will know I will be single because I'm not looking for a relationship, and If I don't feel safe and I feel pressured and uncomfortable I won't date them, and he knows. Thank you again

  • You can date someone with trust issues yes but it will be difficult. You have to put on more effort to prove to him that you really do want to be with him even if he says that you don't

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    • Thank you, and yes I don't mind, because sometimes he acts like he wants to believe but then he doesn't, so I might have a chance if I keep proving it to him

    • If you really do love him than you'll try and eventually he'll see that you do and learn to trust you.

  • No, they might get jealous, or
    Spy on you, that's how my last bf was like.

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    • I understand and sometimes he does acts a little jealouse but he stopped when he noticed I'm not interested in no one. Oh my did he stopped eventually?

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