Does being friends first ever work?

I sort of dated this girl I met on a night out for about 2 months. We met up quite a few times and I even went to her house and met her family a couple of times. Throughout the whole thing she seemed unsure about how she felt about me, and I think this was because I tended to be very reserved around her. I sometimes told her that I liked her but only through text, never when we were together. We never really even kissed properly, just cuddled while watching films and stuff quite a lot.

She eventually went cold saying I make her uncomfortable sometimes because of my quietness. I said I couldnt be just friends with her so we stopped texting. She reached out a few weeks later saying we should catch up. She was a bit flakey but she eventually came over. She only stayed for a couple of hours and we still didn't do anything. I was so annoyed that I didn't do anything that I texted her the next day just saying that I couldnt be friends with her just assuming thats what she wanted, so we should stop talking. She said she didn't understand because it felt like we were just hanging out as friends, and said if thats what you want then ok.

Its been 2 weeks now and i still miss her. I'm not usually a super quiet person, its only when I really like a girl I get really nervous and anxious. Have I done the right thing by not accepting friendship or should I keep in contact with her and show her that I'm not actually as reserved as she thinks I am?



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Most Helpful Girl

  • You should have stayed friends. You've known her for a bit and I would think she deserves more than you going cold turkey. There's no bad blood, no reason to cut ties. You'll get closer and more open with her the more you talk in general. And just be honest that you like and you suck at being emotional. 😘

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What Girls Said 3

  • Yes it does. It also helps as well.

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  • In my experience no because men mess it up. HARD. Most of you can't handle the fact getting with a friend means you'll probably settle with them because the trust, lack of silly boundaries, and understanding is there and most of you get cold feet and bail out.

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  • It works for some people and not for others. For me, it doesn't seem to work.

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What Guys Said 1

  • It can work, but you need to push the interaction to the next level.

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