Does he really love me or should I let go?

My bf and I have been fighting a lot. We've been saying for almost 2 years now and I love him more then anything and says he does to. But when he fight he says hurtful things to me. We fought yesterday and he told me he wanted a break and that I should find someone else. He said he's only with me because he has to and said I'm selfish. He kept saying I can't stand to see him happy without me and he cursed me out. I went go his house to talk to him and he pushed me and broke a ton of things. Then we made up and he hAd apologized the next morning for everything. I don't know what to do. Does he really feel this way or was he just mad? He means so much to me and I'm scared I won't be able to handle myself without him. And he planned marriage with me. It hurts so much to even think of him with someone else. What should I do? He hurts me at times s much emotionally then just apologizes. I know I have to be strong but honestly It feels like there's noone like him. When he's sweet and kind to me, it feel like I'm on top of the world but other times he makes me feel so low


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You should sit down and have a heart to heart with him. If he loves you, he will try to change! Not to say that there shouldn't be fighting, but he isn't fighting/arguing with you in a healthy way and that needs to change. If you have already done this and his behavior persists, it might be time to move on. Life is far too short to be spending it unhappily, even if there are great times, there should never be horrible times in a relationship solely because your partner belittles and makes you feel this way. It's not healthy. You guys have given 2 years of your lives to one another, just explain to him how he makes you feel and that if he wants to keep you in his life he needs to better his habits! Not everyone can be what you need them to be and never be afraid to walk away from something that isn't right for you even if it seems impossible to do.

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    • I just want to tell him all this and I feel like when I tell him how I feel he just tells me I'm selfish and only concerned abou me own feelings. Being that you're a guy, how would you want a girl to tell you this.

    • I hate to break it to you but I'm a girl lol I don't know if you have the comments mixed up but either way, if you've expressed your feelings to him about this and he doesn't care or try to change, it's time to move on. You owe it to yourself to be with someone that cares about your feelings and doesn't belittle you for them.

What Guys Said 2

  • You wouldn't like my answer young lady

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    • Let's hear it. I'm so confused... This relationshil has become so toxic

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    • Life is too damn short to be mistreated and made to feel like your a bad person young Lady. Me and my lady have been together for 18 years as of August. It not all been easy nor fun , but we don't belittle one another regardless as to how hard times seemed. Don't be another persons door mat or foot stool , I promise if this is how he is now it's not likely going to get better of his accord

    • Not all guys cheat either , but if he found it easy to do after only two years of being together , he is comfortable with the idea and in my opinion would try it again

  • I was in the same boat as you. I kept holding on though. She would keep beating me down but I stayed because when she wasn't mad I was very happy and loved her. Then she had enough of our fighting and left me even though she caused almost all of them. Looking back now, I know I loved her. I still do. But she, she never loved me. Like yes, cared for deeply yes. But not loved. She moved on so much faster then me, even though she was the asshole who hurt me. It sucks loving someone when they don't love you. And I'm so sorry for you. I wish I could help you more. I wish I could say that he'll get better and you'll be happy. But you won't with him. And you should leave and move on. What I can tell you, is after months, maybe even years. You'll move on and find a person who will love you, and who will treat you right always. Even when you fight.

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What Girls Said 3

  • I totally understand that you love him a lot and can't imagine a word without him, but it really sounds like something you should let go of. Not just because of the verbal aggression, but for your safety too. The last thing you want is to get hurt physically because you were too attached mentally. Be as strong as you can and let this guy go.

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    • He apologized and said he would never do it again. And he is so good hearted and I think that's what pulls me back. When we fight he tells me I make his life miserable... But then will come running back a few hours later and apologize and tells me he loves me. He's been very unstable financially and I don't know if that takes role in it and he takes it out on me. Do you think he doesn't really love me?

    • I don't want to stamp that abuser label on him yet, but honey, he has all the traits of one. Notice that he'll say sorry, but then keep doing the same thing. Why? Because you accept it. You take him back each time and he knows it. But you're playing a dangerous game. You're opening the door for him to become abusive, because he's learning that no matter what he does, all he has to do is say sorry and you'll take him back. Don't be that girl anymore, and don't stick around long enough to have any harm done to you. Love yourself more :)

  • Honestly you may love him but sounds like he is no good I think you should you let it go because the longer you stay with him the more damage he will be able to do and No guy should speak to you like that their will be fights in relationships but sometimes men take it too far and this sounds too far Good luck

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  • You need some one better than him!!!

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