What needs to change to make me appealing to guys?

So I seem to have a problem where every guy I talk to is interested in me for about a month then they disappear so I'm trying to figure out how to fix myself. About me: I love sports, I do cheerleading and rugby though I'm always down for the gym or street hockey/basketball, I love soccer to. I enjoy the outdoors and getting messy. Adventures are my favourite things and new experiences. I love kids I'm in college for child and youth work and volunteer with kids with Special needs. I love beer and watching hockey. I'm laid back and usually go with the flow. I don't like the bar scene but I do love to dance. I'm shy and awkward but love making people laugh and feel appreciated. I fall easily and I just want someone to love me back. I play guitar and piano, I bake and cook infact I love the majority of household chores. I love cars and action movies like fast n furious. I enjoy books too and have a high intellect.
What I look like:


I'm working on how fat I am.

What needs to change to make me appealing to guys?





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Most Helpful Girl

  • They disappear after a month? Sounds like those guys who are only after sex and give up when u dont put out. Where are you meeting these guys? Maybe change the scenery where u meet them. I wouldn't recommend meeting them at the bar.

    As far as becoming more appealing.. well I wouldn't advise you to change who you are. All the things you describe is what makes you, you do dont change. When the time is right u will meet a guy who likes you for you. However, the only thing that I see as a possible issue is when u mention u fall easily. That would be fine & dandy if all parties involved are the same way. Unfortunately thats just not reality. Some guys lie & deceive to get what they want. Let it take some time for u to build your trust in a guy. weigh your options. date around. dont just meet a guy, think he's the one & fall for him. take your time & get to know him first. Also, dont just try to impress him. might come across the wrong way. allow him to impress you. think of yourself as a great catch. build up your confidence. at the end of the day just remember dont try too hard. Its either he's the right guy or he's not.

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    • It's just hard because I feel so defective and I just want to find someone

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    • Dont be so hard on yourself. Why are you validating yourself based on whether you've been in a relationship or not? That should not define you by any means. You are so much more than that. No boyfriend doesn't equal pathetic. Just means you haven't met the right guy yet. In the mean time work on your self esteem & enjoy your life to the fullest.

    • If there was nothing wrong with me guys wouldn't be repelled by me

What Guys Said 17

  • Let me start off saying there is nothing wrong you with at all.

    A lot of the hobbies you've mentioned are very boyish. That's not a bad thing, but you can fall into the trap, where guys can start to perceive you as 'one of the boys'. I'm not saying you should stop doing those things. But when around guys, try emphasising more of your feminine side. Also play a little bit hard to get, it sounds like you really want a boyfriend, but don't let him know that. Once he knows that he's got you, he won't try as hard to impress you. So basically keep the chase going until you've been on few dates with him at least and then slowly let him in.

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  • Your personality is good and there is no way your fat. Do you mind if I ask you some other questions?

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    • Sure whatever helps me change :)

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    • So did you look at the link and the photo of the ass and that

    • Sorry if that was too much for you. I think you are very attractive looking 😀

  • You're a very attractive girl. You shouldn't feel like there's anything you need to "fix" about yourself to please a guy. Just be who you are. You've got a lot going for you and you sound like a very active, interesting person.

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    • being who I am isn't getting anyone though that's the problem

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    • I rather have short term than long term

    • I mean short term than no relationship

  • I assume you aren't putting out after a month, correct?

    That's why they disappear

    Has nothing to do with your appearance, you look fine.

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    • I'm a virgin so unless I'm in a commited relationship I don't really want to put sex out I however enjoy giving head

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    • I did he was perfect for me things were going great until one day when he just started ignoring me

    • You're going to need to provide some more detail. Nobody starts ignoring anyone if things are going "great". Try and summarize what happened leading up to the ignoring.

  • You are a beautiful woman. You are NOT fat. Some guys get intimidated by women that have a great body and they think are really attractive. Some have to build up nerve to ask out a girl that looks like you. I am sure guys do not "hate" you. I've liked you since I met you on here.

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    • Thanks but I would've had a boyfriend by now if it was true, instead every guy I want sees me for awhile then disappears

  • You are not fat. Great curves. Stick with darker hair. Stop wearing hats and flannel unless you are going camping.

    Can't really comment on personality as I don't know you.

    Love your dark eyes. Smile!!!

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    • Thank you :)

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    • I was thinking marriage. No one to date? Cmon. I find that very hard to believe. I'll go back in time and as you out. :-)

    • I'm being serious any guy that I want to date, who meets all my wants and needs, and who I feel connects and we have great chemistry any guy like that just disappears or they all decide that the other girl is better and give me up for them, I'm always every guy's last option

  • Dam girl you sound like there is not a lot of room for improvement just keep doing you
    maybe you haven't found a guy on your level yet

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  • Why not try meeting girls? Women do seem to be attracted to each other.

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  • I don't know why they do that looks wise I'd give you 10 and the fact that you seem like a southern girl is so much better. Girls that don't mind getting durty is def. my type of girl

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    • Thanks, I just wish I knew what was wrong with me that guys would just hate me.

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    • Obviously there is something wrong with more or else I wouldn't be single

    • It's not you trust me it's just guys being stupid if i was in there shoes I'd treat you the best way possible hands down and make sure you had the prettiest smile on your face everyday

  • You honestly sound like my dream girl especially if you love beer and hockey

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  • Wow :) just keep doing what you're doing.

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  • Jesus Christ , all the guys U have had Have to be Just Plain Stupid & Blind. Do U like to work on cars & go fast aswell , if so Just Marry me & lets get to it Beautiful !!!

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    • I love being out in the shop, and I love building things in wood shops, my favourite thing is to go fast

  • um your gorgeous Hun!!! I'd go for you :)

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  • You are good looking and seem like a awesome chick to hang with

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  • There is nothing wrong with you u just seem to be falling for the wrong type of guys

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    • But I only like the type of guys I fall for

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    • But I'm not attracted to other guys

    • Well would u be attracted to me because u are my type of girl I would love to go out with

  • Just keep being you :) dont change for people who dont give you the time

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  • YOU ARE DEFINITELY PERFECT!!! Would you go out with me?

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What Girls Said 2

  • well lets not be conceited guys usually admire you if you can stop trying to appeal to them and be yourself

    sooo just be yourself and people will come to you and let them get to know you people are very kind.
    you're not broken you're a human

    flawed by default

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    • No one likes the real me, nobody clearly wants to get to know me

    • than screw people dont waste your time chasing someone who didn't even value you in the first place.

      you sound fine though

  • Dont change yourself just to suit guys! You sound pree damn perfect for a lot of guys just gotta find the right one! :)

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