When someone asks someone for a date and the other party isn't terribly interested, is giving the asker "a chance" the wisest thing? I'm not talking about, "no one owes you a chance" (with which I whole heartedly agree), but is it truly a good idea from a rational and even compassionate standpoint? I personally think it's neither wise nor compassionate in most cases, but I'm curious what others think.
Most Helpful Girl
NO it is not compassionate or rational unless if the reasons for the negative view can be remedied.
I've heard this many times over. Whenever I'm asked why I don't give the guys who come up to me a chance, I say that because it will end in disaster. Always.
I think if people acquiesce to the request of the Asker, the Asker may think--erroneously--that the person is truly into them. That would be lying to the Asker and is completely unfair to them. They should be with someone who honestly truly likes them for who they are.
For me, it's always the physical attraction. So many wo/men have said, "But you'll become attracted to him once you get to know him". I've tried that and it DOESN'T happen with me. The guy gets a pretty girl and he thinks that I'm attracted to him (lie) while I have this lie that I'm keeping up and feel horrible for going with it to make sure that he doesn't get "hurt".
He will get hurt either way--I'd rather simply be honest.1