Urgent help please?

ok so I really like my very close friend sometimes I think she likes me and sometimes I think she doesn't but anyway I found out she's going on a date tomorrow (shes not told me yet), I really dont know what to do, I want to tell her how I feel but Im so scared of ruing the friendship, but ill go crazy if I dont tell her then she ends up getting with this guy... Can anyone tell me if theyve ever been in this situation on either end of the stick and tell me how that went? Also if I was to tell her how should I go about doing it, what should i say?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I recently lost a friendship with a longtime best friend who didn't understand the vibes i was sending. I didn't want a relationship and thought i made it clear when i dated other guys. I was never cruel and our friendship 'endured' after months of bitterness and fighting in which i had finally had enough. To me, after recently being through the negative outcome of this, i read her actions as similar to mine, almost identical scarily enough. But she is not me and he is not you (sorry for the klingon XD) however i wouldn't recommend you saying anything ( and i do recommend you saying something so it doesn't eat away at you) until after you get an idea of how she feels about this guy. If she is into him, it is unlikely she would be open to the idea of being with you (unfortunate thing with the friendzone thing) and if its just a one off thing, who knows? All i ask is that you respect her decision and be prepared to move on for both your sakes.

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    • she met the guy last night for the first time while out with our friends, I think she may like me, I was driving us to another city the other day and usually she never wants to put songs on yet this time, she asked to dj then kept putting love songs on, ones about people needed to tell people how they feel and things, could this mean anything? also we often spoon at each others houses and one time she rubbed my stomach then put her hand on my crotch I pretended to be asleep (i didn't know how to react, I know embarrassing) but she might of just done that because she's drunk. Because ye she does all this stuff thenshe just doesn't seem interested other times but I think that could be her just trying to hide it maybe. What do you think?

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    • To be honest not really, im quite blunt and dont like dancing around the issue, however i know the song choices thing is something a couple of friends of mine would do and without knowing your girl i can't really give a definate answer. and i totally understand what you mean about the 'meaner jokingly' again it means she's comfortable around you. (also its a good thing she doesn't do the spooning thing with other guys :P) if you feel you should speak to her before her date then who is to stop you? The best person to judge the situation is you and there is always a chance of either a positive or negative outcome. As for the asking as cliche as it sounds, just be yourself even if you ask with nerves or stuttering. Hopefully i've been a little help to you and I wish you the best of luck.

    • ok ok, thanks :) if I manage to grow some and tell her Ill let you know how it goes

What Girls Said 1

  • I'm currently going through something similar. Just got told by my best friend that he loves me but I don't feel that way from him. He is now avoiding me and it's showing its toll on our friendship. I'm completely helpless

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    • I wouldn't avoid her if she said no, Im worried about how she will then act towards me If she said no... how did you feel when he told you would you still be interested in seeing as friends (if he wanted to) even though you don't like him like that?

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    • ook thanks for the advice, hope your problem gets sorted!

    • Thanks but I highly doubt it

What Guys Said 1

  • Mixed signals from a girl is almost always an indication of her not being interested in you romantically. Besides, you said she is going on a date with someone else. So in all likelihood, it's a lost cause. Just find someone else.

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    • just because she's going on a date doesn't me she doesn't like me, I've been on dates while I still really liked her

    • Even if you leave out that part, the fact still remains that she is giving mixed signals. So that's probably a red flag. You can try asking her out, though. You have nothing to lose.

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